


Floor 1 1/2

by Sleepily



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Background Relationships, Dubcon Kissing, Dubious Consent, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Homophobic Language, M/M, Max is 18 now, Past Suicidal Thoughts, Teacher-Student Relationship, Weed, but still consent after first kiss, but they arent discussed in depth, david is 24, first kiss is sketchy, max is 17, misunderstandings because of fake relationship, nikki/ered background, past drug abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:48:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 15
Words: 30,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21823918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleepily/pseuds/Sleepily
Summary: On his way home from Nikki's house on the night before his first day of his senior year, Max sees David, a teacher at his school, passed out in front of his apartment complex. Max helps David inside, but ditches him in the stairwell after David drunkenly kisses him.He thinks that's the last he'll see of David, but there he is on his schedule:5th period, English, David Luna.
Relationships: David/Max (Camp Camp)
Comments: 47
Kudos: 130





	1. Chapter 1

Max was high.

This pleased him greatly as he walked the 2 miles it took to get home. Nikki would’ve driven him home, but she was also high, and Max _never_ got into the car of anyone under the influence of anything. He hated life, but he didn’t hate it _that_ much.

A train horn blared loud enough that he could feel it shake the air proved he was close to his apartment, closer to falling asleep and waking up to a fucking alarm again. He wished he could set his alarm as a train horn, since those didn’t scare the ever-loving shit out of him every time they went off. He swore that his alarm gave him anxiety.

The train sounded again. _See, peaceful._

If he continued straight, he would see the tracks. Normally, he would go hang around them and put pennies on them, but no, today he would go home. His parents wouldn’t be home tonight, so he didn’t need to worry about coming home high.

Not that they would care if they were home.

He turned and started down his street. A streetlamp was flickering, which it had been doing since a car hit it last week. He glared it down in the darkness of the night, daring it to tip over on him as he walked under it. It didn’t. Cars were parked along the edges of the street, shitty cars, but strangely, there was a Bentley. A fucking Bentley, which was arguably a _very_ nice and _very_ out of place car. He raised his eyebrows at it and couldn’t help but touch it. It felt nice and smooth against his fingers, and he probably pet it for a solid minute, but once again, he was baked and _time_ didn’t mean much.

Once Max realized how weird he must’ve looked, he quickly removed his hand and crossed the street to his apartment building. He paused. He wasn’t seeing shit, right? He approached the body passed out by the main door. _Please don’t be a dead body, please don’t be a dead body,_ he thought to himself as he nudged the man with his foot. He jumps back when the man shakes awake and looks at him.

“Max?” He says.

Max is taken aback, but studies the man’s face in silence as he tries to place where he knows him from. He looks familiar enough, but Max would’ve remembered him if they spoke. _So he just knows my name, then?_ He wonders.

“Sorry,” the man continues, and tries to stand up, using the wall behind him to balance. Max smelled alcohol on his breath, but he wasn’t _that_ drunk, probably, “Mrs. Gwen lives here.”

Max blinks, suddenly recognizes him. He was a teacher at his school… or maybe a staff member? Max’s not sure, but Mr. Luna works for the school. _Ok but how does he know your name, idiot?_

“Ok,” is all Max says, grabbing the man’s arm to help pull him up.

“Gwen said she ordered me an Uber, but…” Mr. Luna checks his phone, which _jesus christ, that thing is shattered,_ “I think she did it wrong ‘cause it’s been a half hour. Do you mind unlocking the door? I don’t know the code.”

“Is that your car?” Max asks, pointing at the Bentley.

He was pretty sure teachers didn’t get paid well enough to pay for that nice of a car.

“Yes, do you like it? I can-”

Max ignores him and punches the code into the keypad. Mr. Luna blinks but smiles and follows Max inside, swaying as he moves about. Max allows the teacher (he’s gotta be a teacher, he remembers Nikki bitching about him last year… David Luna but they called him David or something.) to grab his shoulder to balance himself when he stumbles over his own feet. 

“There you go,” Max says, shaking off the hand on his shoulder at last, “You’re inside.”

Max starts to walk away, grabbing the railing to the stairs, checking the time on his phone.

11:11

Shit, it was late. 

“Um,” David stumbles behind him and Max feels the teacher slump against his back. 

Max freezes and slowly turns around to look at the man.

“What?” He spits, walking up a few steps to gain distant. He smirks in satisfaction as the man faceplants.

“Can you help me up?” His voice is muffled by the carpet. 

Max grabs the man’s hood and pulls him to his feet.

“Let me guess,” Max says, “She lives on the second floor?”

“...Yeah.”

Max sighs and pulls one of the teacher’s arms over his shoulder and grabs his waist.

“Grab the railing,” Max commands.

He was only being nice because the man could be his teacher this year and he’s _not_ about to fail for leaving him on the stairwell.

The teacher grabs the railing like Max told him to and they slowly make their way up the stairs. They stop halfway up the stairs so Max can catch his breath. He’s strong, but David is _heavy_. Max stumbles into the wall, dragging the teacher with him.

“Fuck,” David says.

_Can’t believe he swore,_ Max thinks.

His arm is no longer wrapped around Max’s shoulder, but his hand is resting on it. Max’s hand is no longer on his waist, but just clutching the back of David’s shirt. Max heaves out a breath in exhaustion and looks up to say something, but silences immediately by a nose brushing his. _He’s very close._ His head bumps the wall as the hand on his shoulder slides up his neck and-

_He’s kissing me. I was wrong, he’s very drunk._

There’s stubble brushing against his face, a hand in his hair, pulling him closer. 

“Why’d it have to be _you?”_ David whispers.

Max, whose hand was still on David’s shirt, tightens and he tugs the man off of him. His beanie is pulled off his head in the process, but Max lets it fall to the floor and he _rejects, rejects, REJECTS_ with his full strength. Max glares dangerously down at the teacher, who fell due to the force of Max’s rejection. 

“What the _fuck_ ,” he seethes and storms off, leaving his beanie on the floor.

What the fuck.

His feet pound up the stairs and he scurries off down the hall, bumping into Mrs. Gwen, and continues on his merry way as she looks after him. She can probably smell the weed on him. He scowls as he reaches his door, unlocks it, then slams it shut behind him.

Stupid fucking teachers.

  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

Max leaned against his front door for a few seconds, a hand on the lock. 

What the fuck. What the fuck. 

His head is still muddled from the weed and it takes a minute for him to realize that actually happened. Everything has already faded away, muted. If he thinks, he remembers it all, but the second he stops, it slips his mind.  _ That happened… right?  _ He likes to smoke, loves it, but sometimes, like now, it fucking sucks. 

He reaches up and touches his lips with his finger tips. After hesitating for a second, he turns his hand around and wipes his mouth with the back of it. 

_ What the fuck. _

He shakes his head and pushes off the door. He heads to his room, cringing at the cigarette smoke smell that lingers in all the furniture of his house. He tries to keep his room shut to dissuade the smell from entering it, but he smells it in his bed sheets and in the carpet. He frowns at the door to his room, which is wide open.

Of course they raided his fucking room again, why wouldn’t they? 

For parents who don’t seem to care if he eats, goes to school, or if he even comes home at night, they  _ really  _ seem to care to know what he hides in his room. Max knows they didn’t find much of anything, since he keeps all his important stuff at Nikki’s. He used to keep it at Neil’s, but Neil’s dad also had a habit of snooping through Neil’s room, usually to make sure his son isn’t doing something illegal, like cooking meth or purposely crashing the stock market. Or whatever science nerds do. 

Nikki is trustworthy. She never read his journal (she did make fun of him for having a ‘diary’ however.) and she only touched his little pile of clothes to do laundry. His money stash was sometimes  _ added  _ to when checked, but never ever missing anything. At a moment’s notice, he could go to her house and stay there a week if he needed to and she wouldn’t complain.

He sighs, shutting his bedroom door and spraying febreeze everywhere. He cracks a window, hoping to air it out as he sleeps. He takes a look around his room just in case, but the only thing missing is the emergency $5 he put in his backpack. He texts Nikki to remind her to set her alarm for tomorrow and to pick him up.

*

Max’s school morning routine was always as follows:

He woke up at 5:30 to grab a pair of clothes. He throws those clothes into the washer with a copious amount of detergent to (hopefully) remove the cigarette smoke smell that always seemed to linger.

He checks on his parents to see if they came home that night and if they made it to bed. If not, he plays his music loudly as he waits for the washer to finish so he can dry them. If they came home, he cleans up the mess they leave in the kitchen and sits in silence. 

Today, they are not home. Today, he facetimes Nikki instead of playing music and listens to her whine about having to get up.

“Why can’t school be set for a later time? Like who do they think they are making me wake up before the sun even rises!” Nikki bitches, “Like I can see the stars!”

Max glances out the window.

“There’s the fucking North Star!” Nikki shouts.

Max rolls his eyes, but he sees it too. The washer beeps in the other room, and he stands up to quickly toss it all in the dryer.

“We better have classes together,” Nikki says suddenly, “‘Cause I can’t go another year without seeing my best friend all day.”

“Told you that you should copy my schedule.”

“You don’t take PE!”

“Yeah but we get to leave together,” Max says with an amused smirk.

Max already finished his elective course credits and chose to have his last 2 periods of school free so he could leave for lunch and not have to come back. He only had science, reading/writing, history, math, and stupid French class ‘cause he failed French 1 freshman year. If not for that, he could leave after 4th period. Nikki was a smart student, surprisingly, and only had to do her core courses. She also chose to do PE, which meant she got out for lunch. RIP to his wallet, he knew they would already eat out together most days.

Max had already quit his summer job, racking up a good sum of money. Food money, mostly.

“I’m on my way,” Nikki says a half hour later as Max is pulling on his clean pants. 

He sniffs at himself, hoping he washed away the smell, and quickly heads into the hallway. Nikki is still talking to him as he plugs in his earbuds.

“-new car?”

“What?” Max deadpans once his head phones in.

“There’s a new car outside!”

“Yeah?” Max asks, a little nervously.

“It’s sexy too, get out here!”

“I’m coming, you fucking loser.”

He passes by what he’s pretty sure is Mrs. Gwen’s room. He feels his heartbeat raise, but there’s no sound coming from behind it. He sighs a bit in disappointment. He wanted to see David, if only to stir him up a bit.

_ Should I blackmail him?  _ Max wonders to himself but shakes his head.

He would’ve jumped at the opportunity as a middle schooler, probably even up until a sophomore, but he’s not that person anymore. He’s grown up, he’s-

Max stalls by the door of the stairwell because  _ there he is _ . He watches in silence at the man fiddles on his phone. Max peeks at the screen. A GPS. He doesn’t want to say anything, doesn’t want to alert the man he’s here. Over the sound of Nikki talking, he hears David’s keys clanking against each other.

_ David, _ Max frowns,  _ Nikki always called him David. _

The whole school did. He was one of those teachers no one really respected. They liked him, sure, but Max had never even heard of students calling a teacher by their first name until David. It was kind of weird.

“Max, hurry up!” Nikki whines.

David finally moves. He continues down the steps, pulling off the beanie on his head.

_ Red hair,  _ Max notes.

“Starting route to-” The mechanic voice says until it’s muffled by being shoved in David’s pocket.

Max slowly follows down the steps, catching the tail end of David exiting the building.

“What? David lives here?” Nikki asks.

Max rushes down the last steps and exits the building too. Nikki is parked out front, watching David cross the street towards his car.

“WHAT? I THOUGHT TEACHERS WERE BROKE.” She shouts. Max hears the end call tone.

Then she honks. She  _ fucking honks _ .

David whips his head around, startled. His eyes immediately catch on Max, who hopes his expression is calm, and his face flushes. Nikki rolls her window down.

“You live here?” She shouts.

David’s eyes leave Max at last and looks to her like it’s the first time he realized she was there.

“No.”

There’s silence where Max would usually fill in. 

Nikki doesn’t know. Nikki wouldn’t let him get away with not teasing the teacher ‘cause Max always poked fun at people. And Nikki doesn’t know, so he  _ can’t not _ say anything,

“Walk of shame?” Max asks, smirking whole heartedly. 

David doesn’t respond but he squirms. Max feels big. He’s got the upperhand. 

“Oh?” Max says sarcastically, moving closer to David as he rounds the car to get into the passenger side. “I thought Mrs. Gwen was married.”

Max opens the car door and jumps in.

“Drive,” Max whispers to Nikki quietly.

Max leans out the window.

“Unless…” He trails off as Nikki shifts into drive and slams the pedal, the car roaring. 

It isn’t for another block that Max finally rolls up the window.

  
  



	3. Chapter 3

“You good?” Nikki asks, glancing out of the corner of her eye at Max.

Max taps his fingers on his leg. He trusts Nikki with his things. He trusts her with his money, with his secrets, but can he trust her with this? He looks at her, looks away, then looks again, staring.

“What?” She asks in annoyance.

“Yeah, I’m good,” He says after a minute, hesitating, “I ran into David last night.”

“Oh?” She says, turning down the volume a little, inviting him to continue.

“Drunk as a skunk, thought he was dead.”

“What? He’s kind of stuck up, never knew he could party.”

Max looks away and stares out the window. Should he?

“I helped him inside ‘cause he was really drunk, like _really,_ really drunk… He kissed me,” Max confesses.

He expects her to explode with a ‘WHAT’ or something, but she doesn’t.

“Oh?” She repeats.

Max stays silent, fingers spazzing on his lap as he resists the urge to turn up the volume. He looks out at the dark sky, at the faded stars, at the city far, far in the distance.

“I’m not very surprised,” She says after a moment, causing Max to turn and stare at her, “He asked about you a lot last year.”

“What?”

“I guess he saw you walking me to his class, knew we were 'dating'… never told him otherwise, obviously. But, he knew your name.”

“He just _knew_ it?”

“Yeah.”

Max furrows his eyebrows. _How does he know me? How long has he been looking at me like that?_

Max turns the volume up.

*

The student parking lot is a fucking mess, as always. Max can’t wait until parking passes become mandatory.

His coffee is hot, like a little fire in his hands.

In the next few spots over, a group of sophomores are blasting music with the windows down. Other-Neil waves at Max from the crowd surrounding the car. Max politely waves back. The sun is still down, but just barely. All the seniors are heading towards the football field for the Senior Sunrise.

Max never really went to football games, not since Nikki quit cheer. They met freshman year through a football game. They already kind of knew each other beforehand from sharing classes in middle school and elementary, but had never spoken. 

He had been making out with _Jacob Miller_ , who had been bragging about being on varsity, but he just kept the sideline seats warm. They were hidden by the locker rooms, which wasn’t much of a hiding place, but more of a “if you see us, then that’s your fault because no one even comes back here” type of thing. Anyway, they were making out when Nikki rounded the corner, sweating and bleeding from her newly busted lip. 

It was 2016, Max honestly didn’t care about being caught since it was very unlikely to go around, and even if it did circulate through the school, no one would really care. 

He just didn’t want his parents finding out.

Jacob Miller was another story ‘cause Nikki was his girlfriend. 

Max flashed a peace sign to her and started backing up to leave.

“Max Jones, you better fucking stay right where you are,” she demanded of him, “Like, come on? My boyfriend?”

Max smirked, mostly out of embarrassment than assholishness. 

Jacob threw his hands up in surrender, “It’s not what it looks like, he pushed himself on m-.”

“I’m not stupid, Jake, I knew you were gay.”

“I’m not ga-“

“Maybe not completely, but I know you don’t like me at the very least.”

“I can’t believe you would accuse me of that,” Jacob growled, as if he hadn’t just been caught with his tongue down Max’s throat. 

He opened the door to the boys’ locker room and escaped, leaving Max and Nikki alone. Nikki sighed and pulled off Jacob’s jersey, throwing it at Max. Max caught it and looked down at it in confusion. 

“Return it for me, please.”

Max shrugged. It was understandable why she didn’t want to return it herself. She just caught him cheating on her, after all.

“Now I gotta find a new beard,” she whined.

“A what?”

“A new _beard._ ” 

Max furrowed his eyebrows.

“How do you not know what that is?” She asks, laughing, “I like girls.”

Max still didn’t get it.

“A beard is a guy, in my case, who I pretend to be straight with.”

“Oh.”

And that was how they met and started “dating.” 

Even now, sitting on the football field together 3 years later, they were “dating.” Nikki’s mom worked at the school, and if she had any ideas her daughter was a lesbian, she’d throw a fit (according to Nikki,) so Max covers for her. He didn’t really get why Nikki was so adamant that her mother not find out (since she wasn’t _that_ homophobic or anything, as Max had seen, but she definitely wouldn’t let Nikki let her female “friends” sleep over anymore) but he respected that she didn’t want her mom finding out until she moved out. Anyway, it made his life easier because girls and _“I’m not gay”_ guys stopped hitting on him. Maybe at one point, Max hadn’t minded getting with those types of guys, but he had matured and he didn’t want to play around and hide his relationship _if_ he had one. Guys in denial were fun but would leave him for a girl at a pin drop. 

“It’s so pretty,” Nikki says. 

Max looked at the sunrise. It was indeed pretty.

*

Max and Nikki shared their 1st and 5th period. He and Nikki shared a look.

5th, English, David Luna.

After that awkward, drunken kiss, Max hadn’t expected to see the teacher anymore, past what Max knew would be awkward meetings in the hall when David visited Mrs. Gwen.

“Looks like he’s no longer teaching juniors but seniors.”

“Maybe ‘cause some of them are legal but still students,” Max muttered.

Nikki gave him a look and Max sighed. The kiss hasn’t _bothered_ him, per se and Max knew that Nikki knew that. If it had, David would be in cuffs. Max didn’t take kindly to anyone doing _anything_ to him that he didn’t like. In truth, he was just very surprised and caught off guard. He was pretty sure that David hadn’t meant _’Max Jones’_ Max when David kissed him, but… some other Max.

Who was he kidding, David definitely meant him.

It was morbid curiosity that kept Max from doing anything about it because _technically_ David had assaulted him.

Max wanted to watch him squirm.

Nikki squeezed his hand and reached out with her other hand to smooth the wrinkle between his brows. Max reached up and swatted her hand away, but she grabbed it. She pulled them off to the side of the hall so they didn’t block the way of others, still holding both his hands in her’s. 

“Y’know, if you want to stop being my beard… I don’t mind petitioning Neil to be my new one.”

“Nikki,” Max rolled his eyes, squeezing her hands, “If you’re in the closet, then _I’m_ in the closet too.”

Nikki smiled.

“Now come on, you fucking loser,” Max said, pulling one of his hands from her grip, “Lets go to class. _You don’t want to be late.”_

Nikki laughed.

*

Contrary to what he said, Max was getting kind of stir crazy from having to kiss his beautiful but _icky_ friend when he could be scouting out a decent man to date. However, scrolling through David’s public (what an idiot, what teacher in their right mind leaves it public?) Instagram page with Nikki made it somewhat tolerable.

“He’s kinda cute,” Nikki whispered.

The two of them were in the back corner, desks pressed together. There was a little circle of empty desks surrounding them since no one wants to sit next to the ‘lovey-dovey’ couple that the two pretended to be. _God forbid_ the two decided to get frisky in class, or whatever. Max had witnessed tons of gross flirting himself from other couples, so he understood their reluctance. Anyway, it allowed them the privacy to zoom in on David’s face (he has freckles) and look at obscene, dirty comments left by some anonymous school meme pages.

_I would act UP if I was his student like damnnnn_

_I think I’m failing ur class with a 69, let me come see u after class_

_Graduated last year, but let me re-enroll real quick_

_Bout to do me some after school test corrections_

_I got an F, maybe let me get the D_

“Oh lord, these people are thirsty,” Max muttered, but hearted all the dirty comments with a smug look on his face.

Nikki giggled and liked a _photo_ of David holding a ‘Teacher of the Year’ award. Thank god it was _her_ phone.

A couple minutes later, while Max was ‘paying attention’ to the teacher going over the class syllabus, a notification popped up on Nikki’s phone.

“No way,” she whispered, shoving the phone into Max’s face.

“He _liked_ a photo _?_ ”

Max quickly clicked on the notification and it pulled up the photo David liked. It was an older photo, a solid few rows down in Nikki’s post history.

It’s from Nikki’s point of view, both of her hands cupping Max’s face. He remembers the traumatizing view of her taking the photo using a timer and putting it between her— _ew_.

Nikki is breathing down his neck.

Max refreshed the notification page, but the notification is gone. He types in David’s username, but the user is ‘private.’

“He blocked me!” Nikki sounded offended.

“Well, he _did_ just get caught creeping on your page.”

“On _your_ photo!”

Max handed her the phone back and sighed in relief as the bell rang. 

“Want me to walk you to class?” Max asked her, scooping up his bag and her bag too.

“Yes, baby,” she said, wrinkling her nose and smiling.

He booped her nose and smiled back. They exited the room and Nikki pulled out her schedule. She hooked her elbow in his as he guided her safely around people walking the opposite direction. He felt eyes on the two of them as they passed the new freshman. 

The two of them were definitely a couple to ogle. Nikki’s colored hair might’ve initially drawn attention, but her pretty face is what kept the attention on her. Max wasn’t very tall, but Nikki was on the shorter side and made him look taller than what he actually was. Nikki had a bubbly look. Max had a ‘bad boy‘ vibe. He had a nice face too, mostly with his bright eyes. Nikki’s hair actually brought out his eye color, as they were almost identical in shade. They complimented each other. They had heard it from their friends, from Nikki’s mom, from teachers, and little old ladies on the street. They were soulmates. They were the _cutest couple_.

_Cutest couple of gays, maybe._

Max didn’t understand how they could miss it. Nikki was a tomboy through and through. She stared at girls and rarely _ever_ kissed Max. She’d hold this one girl’s (her ex that she was still in love with) hands in the hall sometimes. Max ogled boys and flirted with boys, albeit not that strongly. He swears the way he walks sometimes gives him away. How could they miss it?

_Cause they’re not looking,_ Max thinks to himself.

He glances up.

Green eyes, red hair. Stupid smile, ‘teacher of the year’ last year. 

Nikki’s hand on his arm fades away. He knows it’s still there, but he can’t feel it. The chatter of students shuffling through the hall muffles. His stomach tingles. He feels a squeeze on his arm.

_Nikki_.

Max looks away. 

“You walked right past my class, doofus,” Nikki teases. 

Eyes. There’s eyes on him. Eyes on them. He wonders how long these eyes have been watching him before he noticed. A few months? A year? 2?

Nikki’s hand slides down his arm as they face each other in front of Nikki’s teacher’s door, sliding into his hand. He grabs her other one. They stare at each other. The hairs in his neck are raised.

_Look. Watch me. I’ll make you look away._ Max thinks at David. 

He lets one of Nikki’s hands go and gently reaches up to cup her face.

_I’ll make you hate me as much as I hated you last night._

He leans in, watching her eyelashes flutter (he sees her eyes roll minutely at him, annoyed) and kisses her. Nikki pinches her nails in his hand, a warning. He pulls back slowly, slides his hand from her cheek to her nose. He boops it.

People are staring. He can see them staring. 

_Are you watching?_

“I love you,” he tells her softly.

“I love you, too,” she says back.

She slowly steps away and enters her class.

When Max looks over, David is gone.

_Blackmail isn’t really my style. I’d rather destroy the part of you that likes me._

_I’ll destroy you._


	4. Chapter 4

**Fuck you ugly butt** , Nikki texts him 2nd period.

**Sorry** , Max texts back. 

Geometry 2 is boring already, and it hasn’t even started. The syllabus is stupid since the whole class is ‘hey! Shapes!’ so the teacher blabbers on about a seating chart (a seating chart in senior year? fun.) and how every monday, the class will be taking a notebook quiz. A notebook quiz! 20% of Max’s grade is on whether or not he writes down the stuff on the white board.

And guess what? They already have to write stuff down in their notebooks.

_Objective: Go over and understand the course expectations, future assignments, and class procedures._

Procedures like putting your phone in one of the 30 pockets of a stupid piece of fabric that you’re actually supposed to put your shoes in.

Max knew the district was getting stricter on phones, where they can only be used in passing periods, lunch, or if the teacher has the green BYOD sign hung up somewhere. God forbid the red BYOD sign is hung up ‘cause then you’ll have to pay a $15 fee.

By the end of the period, Max learns the teacher’s favorite animal is a penguin, the class will suck big time, and that notebook quizzes are 20% of his grade. Fantastic, honestly. Why couldn’t he get the cooler teacher that had the class next door? He swore the counselor had something against him putting him in this class.

US history was taught by a coach since he wasn’t allowed to coach unless he taught something too. No syllabus there.

4th period French was equally miserable as 2nd. Freshman year, Max’s class had the misfortune of their teacher leaving and going back to france because her cancer was getting worse. Everyone was sad to see her go for the most part. Then, her sub came. She was the sub for 2 weeks and everyone _hated_ her because she made them memorize 1-500 in french when they had just learned Bonjour and nothing else. After the sub, a new teacher filled in for the rest of the year. She played french children songs on Youtube and ‘learn french’ videos. Max failed the second semester.

His sophomore year, they had a new french teacher. She was a great teacher, actually. Sadly, she ended up having a mental breakdown and yelled at Max’s class before she quit. The man who filled in for her spoke only french 90% of the time.

Junior year was the same, and he flunked the redo of French 1. And here he is again, sitting in French 1 with a mix of freshman and his senior classmates who also flunked repeatedly. He sat next to one of his openly gay classmates (Max was glad to see he was happy because, despite what others may think, Max _has_ a heart and doesn’t want to see anyone out of the closet being treated like shit. That’s what he liked about his generation though: most people didn’t care… usually only parents.)

During the new French teacher’s syllabus, Max received a message.

**Meet me at gum pole in 5** , Nikki texts.

**We’re ditching?** Max texts back.

**Not exactly.**

**Hm… Bet.**

Nikki is waiting where they planned to meet. The nurse’s pass Max received from his teacher (“Really? Sick on the first day? Or hungover?” _Not funny.)_ is in the trash. 

She stands besides the nasty pole that’s covered in gum (long since turned black from being weathered) going back to over a decade ago. 

_Big chance one of those black gunk spots has herpes._

She reaches into her mouth and pulled out her own piece of gum, then sticks it to one of the few empty spots. 

“Ta da!” She says, then gestures, “Follow me.”

He looks around for anyone watching, but no one is. He follows her through the parking lot and past the cars to the little black, metal fence that separates a residential cul-de-sac from school property. There’s no need to jump it, as there’s a little gate. She leads him through the neighborhood to a park he had been to a few times with her. 

It’s empty.

“I feel like you need a little courage to get through this next class, eh?” She says teasingly, holding up a little jar she keeps hidden in her glove box.

“Lets smoke,” Max agrees.

*

Max is high. Nikki is high. 

Her hand in his in the hallway feels icky. He wonders for the first time since kindergarten if girls have cooties. It sure feels like it.

She smells like a girl. She looks like a girl. She _is_ a girl.

Max knows he’s staring but he can’t help it. Why do guys like girls? Guys are where it’s at.

_Yummy, guys._

_Poor Neil_ , Max thinks suddenly. He knew Neil had a thing for Nikki, but he respected Max and Nikki’s relationship to never say or do anything. _He doesn’t even have a chance, this green-haired weirdo likes girls._

Max looks away. Nikki is staring at girls. Max better start staring at boys. 

_Freshman, freshman… ooh, cute senior, straight though._

They enter David’s class, hand in hand. David, the wimp, is conveniently not standing by the door or in class. Nikki and Max sit next to Neil, who is staring at them. His nose wrinkles.

“Your breath _stinks_ ,” he says, hinting to the Mary Jane smell.

_I wonder if there’s a real girl named Mary Jane._

“Gum?” Max asks.

Neil passes them both a stick.

“You’re the best,” Nikki purs.

Neil beams at her, then pulls out his little screwdriver kit. Neil repaired phones and made decent money off of it. Max wondered if he could make a show of breaking his phone in geometry, then having Neil fix it on the down low so he didn’t have to put it in the little pouch cause…

_Too expensive, nevermind._

The bell rings.

Max smirks at the sound, though he admits his chest fluttered nervously ‘cause now he’ll be locked in a room with David. The hallway is different, this is more personal. Max glances at Nikki, but Nikki is staring at her ex. She’s the only other person who knows that Max and Nikki aren’t dating, and that the thought of each other naked makes them both _very_ sad.

“She’s so cool,” Nikki whispers.

“Ered?” Neil asks.

“Yeah, she’s _so_ cool.”

“I guess? I thought y’all weren’t friends anymore??” 

To everyone else, Nikki and Ered were friends who got into a fight over a boy. In reality, they got into a fight because Ered’s family had suspicions and started interfering. It was a sad time for Nikki. Max stayed up with her on the phone night after night, listening to her cry about how she had gotten used to falling asleep with someone and now she couldn’t sleep alone anymore.

Max had cried for her one time. He wished he could love someone that much, but he didn’t. The closest he had was what he pretended to have with Nikki.

Nikki sighs and lays her head in her elbows, resting her head on the desk.

Conversations silence, a redhead steps in.

He’s got on a button up shirt and _fucking jorts._

Max hide his face, muffling silence laughter. _JORTS!_

“Hi, I’m Mr. Luna,” David introduces himself to the class.

“David~” a girl singsongs, “You teach seniors now?”

“Mr. Luna,” David corrects her, but someone else, Nurf, is already calling David ‘David.’

_Too late, asshole. You’ll be David forever,_ Max thinks. David seems to sigh, giving into the fact he’ll never be ‘Mr.’ anything.

He begins to banter with the class, easily becoming decently liked. Max watches with interest.

_I don’t like you,_ Max think, _I don’t like likable people. They always are hiding something._

David sits down at his desk, pulling out a clipboard to do role call.

“Harrison.”

“Present.”

“Jennifer.”

“Here.”

“Jared.”

“What?” The guy says, looking up from his phone, “Oh, here.”

_He’s acting so normal,_ Max thinks, but when he looks at David’s jittery knee and fingers tapping the desk, he realizes that he’s not very calm.

Max looks down at his phone. 5 minutes have already passed.

_Weed makes time skip._

Max blinks and, suddenly, 2 minutes have passed. The class is laughing at something. Max blinks and focuses on the present. David is role calling Neil, but both Neils are in the class and keep responding to David saying “Neil.”

_Is it that funny?_

David takes a deep breath, having lost himself in a laughing fit with the rest of the class. Neil may not be the funniest, but paired with Other-Neil, they could be a pretty decent set of class clowns. David pauses almost imperceptibly, then he glances up through his lashes towards Max. Max pretends not to notice.

“Max Jones.”

_Why did he say my full name?_

“Here,” Max deadpans.

David doesn’t even waver, he just continues reading from the list of names.

“What?” Max whispers to Nikki after she squeezes his thigh.

“Don’t be so cranky,” she whispers back.

“It’s not like that,” Max tells her, “It’s just... weird.”

“Being in his class after what he did yesterday?” She sounds a little upset.

After all, he did technically force himself onto Max.

“It’s not _that._ Something about him bothers me.”

_What does he know about me? What does he want with me?_

“Thus you kissing me in front of him today,” Nikki’s nose is brushing Max’s ear.

Max glances up, catching David’ eye for a split second.

_Is he mad at me?_

_Why does it matter?_

_Let him be mad._

There was a syllabus, but he didn’t read it aloud, thank god. Max could only sit through so many before blasting his brains out seemed more enjoyable. David just quietly curled up into his rolly chair and scrolled through his phone. The rest of the class quickly followed suit. A few set their heads down and slept.

Neil, Other-Neil, and Nurf scooted over to Nikki and Max’s desks, which were pushed against each other again.

“So…” Neil starts a little loudly, “Your 3 year anniversary is coming up, right?”

“Has it really been that long?” Other-Neil asks, raising both his eyebrows.

“Yup,” Nikki admits smugly.

Lying for 3 years wasn’t easy, but there was a bit of pride in both of them that they had managed to keep it up for so long. Nikki and Max has debated a few times previously whether to tell Neil the truth, but Nikki knew Neil liked her, too, and she’d rather not have that awkward conversation. 

“Wow,” Nurf says in his nasally way, “Can’t believe Max hasn’t managed to screw it up.”

“Ha. Ha.” Max rolls his eyes.

Harrison and Harrison’s friend (Nerris?) scooted over to join the conversation.

“I think it’s very romantic,” Nerris says, “3 years is a long time, mostly in high school.”

Nikki smiles, leaning her head against Max’s shoulder.

“So,” Harrison says in his peculiar drawl, “Are you thinking about colleges together?”

Max turns his head and looks down at Nikki, she shrugs.

“No really,” Max says, “We’re not even sure what we want to do yet.”

“But you think y’all will still be together... after graduation?”

Nikki squeeze his arm, hard.

“Time can only tell but--.”

“Are you gonna propose?” Nerris interrupts loudly, looking extremely invested in their relationship.

Nikki somehow squeezes tighter. Max suddenly feels sober.

Nerris’s voice attracted the attention of others around them. Max looks around at everyone in silence. David is looking too. Max doesn’t stall on his face.

Max thinks he has a plan.

“Time can only tell,” Max says softly, kissing Nikki’s forehead, “Anyway, what about everyone else?”

“I want to work at NASA,” Other-Neil pipes up.

Everyone who knew Other-Neil in elementary school all shudder simultaneously. He wore a space suit every day and performed in the 5th talent show to his own one man play. It took _years_ for Other-Neil to stop being _Space Kid,_ and start being _Other-Neil._

“You still want to be an Astronaut?” Neil asks critically.

“Yup. It’s less of a pipedream now, I’ve already started applying to colleges with good space and science programs.”

_Hm,_ Max thinks, _It’s kind of adorable seeing him never giving up on his dreams._

Max turns to face Nikki, who has pulled away from him a bit. 

_I always come up with the best ideas_ _while high._

Max leans down to her ear and speaks quietly to Nikki.

“I have a plan.”

*

“Max, Nikki, come here,” David says once the bell rings. 

The couple make eye contact and shrug, walking over to his desk.

“I know you’re almost adults, but you still have time… you know?” He says vaguely. “You’re all still kids are heart, and there’s no need to rush _those_ decisions.”

Max stares at David, eyes narrowed.

_What are you playing at?_

"Don't worry, we won't," Nikki says, "Only time, eh?"

David nods a little stiffly, looking between Nikki and Max.

“That’s all… nice having you in my class again, Nikki. Nice to meet you, Max.”

The two start to leave the class, hand in hand. Max is a little frustrated. If nothing happens, Max can’t enact his plan.

“Wait, Max,” David calls out.

**_Hook._ **

Nikki squeezes his hand, Max does not squeeze it back. He gently pulls his hand from her grasp. 

“I love you,” Max kisses Nikki’s cheek, “I’ll meet you in the lot.”

Nikki smiles (Max can tell it’s nervous and concerned) but they both know that, even if the plan fails, Max still had the upper-hand. _Max_ is the _student,_ a _minor_ still (for only a few more weeks though) at that _. No matter what, Max_ has the _upper hand_ here, not _David,_ the weird _teacher_ who perved on Max _._

_For how long?_

“Love you, too,” she whispers, then closes the classroom door behind her as she leaves.

Max turns away from the door and faces David. He’s glad he’s sobered up significantly. He wants to remember this moment.

Because this moment will be _the beginning._

“Max, feel free to take a seat.”

Max sits like the obedient boy he is(n’t), looking over at David innocently, who straightens up in his stupid rolly chair. 

They’re alone, finally. It’s currently C lunch, which means no one is coming to this classroom anytime soon.

“What’s up?” Max asks innocently.

“Max…” David sighs, “I’m very sorry about last night?”

Max pulls on his best confused expression.

“What do you mean?”

David furrows his eyebrows.

**_Line._ **

“Last night I…” He trails off.

“Asked me to let you into the building?? Should I not have?” 

Max can see the stall in David's head, processing what Max is saying.

David was drunk last night. It’s perfectly normal to not remember things or make things up. With gaps of your memory, you try to fill in the blanks and sometimes you’re wrong.

_What’s worse than kissing someone you like? Them forgetting it?_

David’s eyes widen a little bit.

**_Sinker._ **

_Or believing you’re crazy enough to make it up?_

“No, thank you for that,” David says, “I’m sorry you had to see me that way.”

“No, it’s fine. I’m glad I could help,” Max smiles at David, “Just make sure not to be caught outside a married woman’s apartment building again?”

“Oh?” David says confused, "Oh!"

Max had to make an excuse for the comment he this morning outside the apartment building.

The “unless…” could’ve easily been about David kissing Max, but if David thought it never happened, then _just how desperate are you? Reading into a word, “pretending” something happened between you and an innocent, little student?_

“No! It’s not like that, she’s an old friend of mine,” David says.

Max pulls on his _I don’t believe you_ face and winks, “Whatever you say.”

_David’s a well liked person, but he’s hiding something: his real personality. I want to break that._

If it was Max, he could. Or that’s what he believed. 

_I want to break you._


	5. Chapter 5

Max had already filled Nikki in on his plan during class.

For the rest of the week, the 2 acted all lovey dovey in front of David. Of course ‘not intentionally.’ If she leaned against him more, cupped his face more, it was because they were in love.

Definitely _not_ to draw attention.

But if it coincidentally drew attention, Nikki would secretly poke Max when David was looking. If he stared for too long, Nikki would pinch him and Max would look up, catch his gaze, smile, and wink as if he was saying _I’ll keep your secret, no need to worry._

David would usually blush, stutter, then look away and continue his lesson.

_Interesting._

At the end of class, without fail, the two would pull two seats over to David’s desk and tell him about their day.

“Harrison-- do you know who he is? Theater Kid? --anyway, he handed me a tryout sheet for his _play._ I can’t believe he wanted me to try out again after the last one!” Max said, laughing.

“You were in a play?” David asks curiously.

“Middle school,” Max says, “I played the Wizard of Oz. I couldn’t stop laughing between scenes ‘cause we really dramatized the hell out of that play.”

_Wizard of Oz. Fitting ‘cause I’m good at pretending._

“Give me a line!” David said, excitedly.

Max leaned back in the chair in thought. He glances at David, who is beaming at him, then glances down at David’s hands, where they rest on the desk. Max feels the thoughtful expression melt off his face, a sorrowful expression solidifying in its place. He reaches out and gently grabs David’s hands with both of his. David blinks down at their hands, but looks up with Max begins to deliver his lines.

_“You want a heart? You don’t know how lucky you are not to have one. Hearts will never be practical until they can be made breakable.”_ Max makes himself sound distant, as if thinking back on a sad past.

And, technically, he was. Opening night to the last performance, his parents never showed up.

David is looking at him, mouth parted slightly.

“Then the Tin Man, who was Harrison, by the way, goes”-- Max squeezes David’s hands and then morphs his face into a determined expression -- _”I still want one.”_

David smiles, but it doesn’t quite meet his eyes.

“See?” Max asks, pulling his hands from David’s, “They dramatized the play so much that people cried instead of laughing.”

David was silent for awhile, “So, are you signing up for this one?”

“No, I was a menace last time! I’m not in the mood to get yelled at by Harrison everyday for the next 3 months for not listening to him.”

Nikki was also overly friendly to David, talking about how much she hated her other classes, and on Friday after the bell rang, she asked about David.

“Are you in a relationship?”

Max liked watching David stiffen, glance at Max, then laugh it off. Max pretended the gaze was because of Mrs. Gwen. He understood what he really meant. He’d seen it in the way Ered looked at Nikki and Max before she knew their relationship was fake. 

_It hurts watching someone you like being happy without you._

“She doesn’t know, don’t worry,” Max whispered to David as Nikki was ‘busy’ looking at David’s bookshelf.

David smiled awkwardly, but didn’t refute the claim that him and Mrs. Gwen were in a secret relationship.

“Well, we better be going,” Nikki says, “My mom wants us to meet her in her class for lunch.”

“Your mom loves me,” Max says, then glances back at David, “See you Monday.”

Nikki led him to her mom’s class, walking slowly. Max knew it was hard for her to lie to her own mother sometimes. Once her mom sobered up, she started giving shit and started to finally fit in her role as a real mom… and _real_ moms wanted grand kids, _biological_ grand kids. 

Nikki wanted to adopt, not get knocked up.

Ms. Candy wasn’t homophobic, per se… but some of the higher ups in the district were, and Ms. Candy could very well lose her job if Nikki came out. 

Even if it was 2019, and most of the kids were accepting, the older generations were always the ones to fear.

When Max curled up in his bed that night, Nikki called him to tell him to come over the next day.

*

Neil was at Nikki’s when Max arrived at noon. He smiled sheepishly at Max, and Max scowled internally. He wasn’t entirely in the mood to play couple.

“Hey, Neil, working on a new project?” Max asks, peeking at the papers spread out on the table in front of his friend.

“Yeah, do you think that molecular… Never mind you wouldn’t get it,” Neil says, going back to his project.

_I’m offended, but you’re totally right._

Neil’s dad must’ve brought someone over again. Max remembered sleepless nights in middle school, listening to Neil’s dad getting action in the room over. It was part of the reason he stopped sleeping over, mostly since it embarrassed Neil to no end.

“Where’s Nikki?” Max asked.

“Room.”

Max knocked on her door softly. She cracks it open to check who it was, then pulls Max in.

“Ered called me last night,” she whispers.

Max looks at the bedroom door, which Neil could totally be eavesdropping behind. _Sorry Neil,_ Max thinks as he turns Nikki’s speaker on. Nikki starts playing music at a moderate level, since they don’t want Neil getting the wrong message, but they didn’t want him getting _any_ message.

_No sex here, bud._

Nikki pulls Max down onto her bed beside her, shoving her phone into Max’s hands.

“Look!” 

On her screen is a call log.

**Ered, 1 hour, 5 minutes, 53 seconds.**

Max smiles, happy for Nikki. 

“What did y’all talk about?”

Nikki begins gushing about Ered’s voice and laugh.

“It’s been so long since I heard her voice, Max… I honestly forgot what it sounded like, but I remember how much I loved it. Max, it’s _so beautiful._ ”

Nikki told him about how they both wanted to get back together.

“Her parents are still suspicious, but they finally stopped snooping through her phone ‘cause they couldn’t find anything. She’s still grounded, but she doesn’t think it’ll last much longer.”

Max was happy for her.

“I love this girl, Max. I honestly love her. I know she’s _it_ for me, Max.”

Max wondered what being in love was like.

What being able to hold hands with someone who touched him kindly felt like. What late night phone conversations felt like. What kissing someone who made his heart race felt like. What talking about the future and getting married felt like. 

Something like what his ‘relationship’ with Nikki was like, but _real._

Max wondered what love even was.

*

Max stood in front of the dryer, looking at the timer. His parents came home last night drunk, so Max was in a bad mood. They woke him up stumbling, then busted down his door to accuse him of being a druggy and demanded to search his bag. They didn’t find anything, obviously, but the emergency money that Max had replenished was conveniently missing.

Max pulled his clothes out of the dryer before the chime signalling the end of cycle could go off. He didn’t want to risk his parents waking up again.

_Where’s my beanie?_ Max wonders, then blinks. _I left it in the stairwell… David never returned it._ _Does that mean that he was wearing my beanie in the stairwell that one time?_

He shakes his head and pulls on his clothes. His shirt is a V-neck and ill fitting, since he bought it before puberty, so he grabs a jacket too. He exited the apartment while fiddling with the zipper of his jacket. Max heard fumbling. He looked over, meeting green eyes.

“Hi, David,” Max smiles, his bad mood instantly washing away.

“... Hi, Max,” He says back, looking sadly down at his hand closing Mrs. Gwen’s door.

_Caught red handed._

“How’s Mrs. Gwen?” Max asks, forgetting the zipper halfway up, instead putting his hands into his pocket.

“Good,” David says, “ _Happily_ married, too.”

Max stands in front of David, maybe a little too closely, waiting for him to move.

“Hmm, _I bet_.”

David sighed, stepping away from Max. Max follows him down the hall, laughing. David holds the stairwell door open. Max thanks him and steps into the stairwell, followed by David.

Max is in front, just like last time. He wonders if David is thinking about it. He glances back at David, who is frowning.

“Cheer up, it’s a new day.”

They walk down the stairs side-by-side, the skinny staircase bringing them close together. They reach the middle platform, halfway between the 1st and 2nd floor. Right where David kissed Max. There’s a slight blush on David’s cheeks as he glances at the wall where he had cornered Max.

Or at least where he _thought_ he had.

Outside, Nikki is waiting in her car. She glances up when she sees the two of them step out.

“Nice car,” she compliments David through a rolled down window.

“Thank you.”

“Can I look at it?” Max asks.

“Um,” David stumbles, “You’re a student, it’s not very appropriate…”

“It’s not like anything weird is going on, right?” Nikki asks

“Right, but it could look bad if anyone were to see.”

“It’s just us,” Max says softly, suggestively almost.

Max sees David’s face flush.

“Still…” 

Max nods and pulls the passenger side door of Nikki’s car open.

“Some other time, then?” Max says cheekily, and Nikki drives off as soon as Max is buckled in.

Max sees David watching their car get farther and farther away in the side mirror.

Max wonders what it’s like being in love.

*

A month passed quickly.

It became a common occurrence to see David leaving Gwen’s. Max wondered if he did started leaving conveniently at the same time as Max so he could walk out with him.

Max failed all the notebook quizzes in geometry.

The french teacher already quit. The openly gay boy in his class was no longer single.

“Do your parents know?” Max had asked him.

“Yeah, they do.”

“What’s it like?” Max asked, but his question could mean anything.

_What’s it like being gay?_ (Max already knew that answer, but it’s not like the other guy knew that.) _What’s it like being out? What’s it like to have feelings for someone?_

_Anything, the question could mean anything._

The gay boy looked at him curiously, “Well, once it’s out, it’s out.”

Nikki and Max continued to stay behind when the bell rang to talk to David about stupid stuff. It took a few weeks fol David to start opening up more. He talked about how he got into teaching and how tough college was.

“I didn’t always want to be a teacher,” David told them, “I just didn’t want to stop going to school. I _loved_ school.”

“You’re weird,” Max teased, “School sucks.”

“Maybe so,” David shrugs, “But being a part of my student’s lives makes it worth it.”

“Not for long, though. They always end up leaving in the end.”

“I suppose, but I’m still happy to watch them grow up, fall in love, graduate, get a job…”

“Fall in love, huh,” Nikki says, leaning against Max.

When David smiles at their PDA, he’s smiling through the skin of his teeth.

“Maybe it’ll be different this year,” Max says, “After all, this is your first ‘graduating class,’ since you’ve been here… what? Since my freshman year? I heard watching the first class you had graduate is one of the first ‘real teacher’ moments.”

Little does anyone know, the one who Nikki is in love with isn’t Max. 

Nikki almost completely stopped calling Max at night, but she would always look tired. Ered did too.

Max was always watching, cheering them on internally, but played the good, love-stricken boyfriend outwardly.

Max was not in love, but he supposes watching others do so was one of his first ‘supportive friend/classmate’ moments.

In English, they read a short story about how humanity lived on Venus, where it rained for 7 years straight. A little girl named Margot remembered the sunshine and told everyone about how it felt and looked. The kids in her class called her names and locked her in a closet. That day, all the other kids got to play happily in the sunshine until it started to rain again and would continue to do so for another 7 years. Margot was trapped in the closet the whole time.

Max supposes his name should be Margot.

*

Max’s 18th birthday comes with a wave of birthday wishes from a number of randoms in the hallway. Someone decorated Max’s locker this morning, and Nikki swears it wasn’t her, but still takes responsibility when people ask. Nerris jokes that it’s about time they fly to Vegas and get hitched.

At least, Max hopes it’s a joke.

The bundle of roses Nikki gave him this morning follow him to his classes, earning Max compliments and more birthday wishes. 

“Now you can buy me cigarettes,” Nurf says, but seriously.

“Not anymore, Texas changed the law,” Neil says, “It’s 21 years old since this September.”

“Looks like I just missed it,” Max says.

In 5th period, Max is pretty sure Nikki gave him bruises by pinching him in the same spot over and over. Max catches David’s gaze most times than not that day.

At one point, the class next doors starts hammering on the wall, scaring the shit out of everyone except David, who looks calm.

“How did that not scare you?” Nerris cries out.

“I don’t scare easily,” David says smugly, “5 points extra credit if you manage to do so.”

The rest of the class looks at each other, almost saying _team up?_

“Anyway, Mr. Ross is mad about yesterday’s Kahoot game being too loud,” David tells them.

Max snorts, remembering how the class busted up at Dixie Normus, Gabe Itch, Phil Micrack, and many other legendary names. David shushed everyone and gestures for all of them to get up and move over to the shared wall.

“On the count of 3, everyone start pounding on the wall.”

Of course some asshole starts pounding before David hits 3, but the rest of the class waits. Thunder unleashes across the room. Max feels the floors vibrating from the force of 30 students, a good group of them athletes, pounding on the wall with all their might. Nurf even left a hefty dent with a right hook. David waves his hands and all at once, everyone stops.

Silence.

Everyone starts to laugh, including David. 

_These are the moments that make me feel alive._

David face turns redder than his hair when he laughs.

When the bell rings, Max hands a single rose to David.

“For Mrs. Gwen,” He says.

David’s fingers turn white by how hard he’s squeezing the desk.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy late Christmas. Happy Hanukkah. Happy Kwanzaa.

Nikki starts leaving right after the bell rings for C lunch to meet up with Ered. Max stays behind with David to give them privacy.

Max wondered how he ever thought he could break David with Nikki there.

When Nikki was there, her presence kept David in check, _reminded him_ that Max has a girlfriend. When Nikki was gone, Max could talk about their ‘secret.’ It was just them, alone in a classroom that was shoved in a corner where people rarely came to unless they were sneaking off to makeout in the emergency stairwell. 

“So… Mrs. Gwen,” Max starts, as usual.

“There really isn’t anything going on,” David replies, as usual. 

“Mhmm,” Max says, following the script.

“She’s married.”

“That never stopped anyone.”

“Gwen’s my friend.”

“I’m your friend and you don’t think about me like that.”

“You’re my student.”

“And she’s a teacher??”

The argument doesn’t make any sense, and it’s a familiar argument, but it never fails to make David flustered.

“What’s Nikki been up to?” And this is where the script ends.

“She’s busy helping her mom,” Max dismisses the question with ease.

“Candy? She’s a good teacher, maybe a little mean at times.”

“That’s true, I’m honestly not sure why she wanted to be a teacher, but whatever,” Max pauses, “You said you didn’t always want to be a teacher, right? What did you want to be before.”

“I wanted to be an artist.”

“So you’re good with your hands?” Max says innocently.

David flushes.

“Right. Anyway, I liked to paint landscapes.”

“You as good as Bob Ross?”

“Never, but I thought I was decent enough at painting to make a living off of it, and I enjoyed it. My parents didn’t approve, they wanted me to become a teacher. I wanted to live life the way I wanted to.”

“So, what changed?” Max’s voice is soft, gentle, probing.

“... I fell in love with one of Gwen’s friends.”

“I’m guessing it didn’t work out?”

“No, it didn’t. Gwen was there for me after the breakup. She told me the school she worked out had a few teachers quit, so they wouldn’t mind letting me be her teaching assistant so I could get my official teaching certificate for the state of Texas.”

“I could never be a teacher, teens are mean.”

“Yeah, they can be, and they were at first, but things changed.”

David is staring at Max.

_What the heck_ , Max thinks, blushing.

“How old is Gwen, anyway?” Max asks, changing the subject.

“30, I think.”

“And how old are you?”

“24.”

Max’s eyebrows raise. He thought David looked young, but not _that_ young.

_To become a teacher that young… you must be pretty smart._

“So, you like them older?” Max smirks.

It’s David’s turn to blush.

“... I like who I like.”

*

On a rare night where Nikki calls him, she tells him about Ered.

She tells him what love feels like.

Max thinks he understands it a little.

*

Mid October brings a tropical storm.

It’s a little late in the hurricane season, but school is cancelled until Halloween, where classes are conveniently back in session for the holiday despite half the student parking lot being taken over by water. Nurf pushes Harrison into the puddle after Harrison made a rude joke about Nurf being buoyant.

Nurf, dressed like a lion, laughed so hard at Harrison looking like a drenched cat (Haha, ‘cause Harrison was Tom) that he almost keeled over and became one himself. Nerris, in her Jerry costume, thought it was pretty funny too.

The school had sent out a newsletter the night before welcoming them back to class and to ‘ _please not dress up for Halloween,’_ but the Varsity Footballers wanted to go as zombies, so they encouraged everyone to dress up for halloween on Snapchat ‘cause _‘they can’t punish everyone.’_

Normally, the school would punish the kids in charge of spreading it around, but they were _precious Varsity boys_ , so nothing came of it.

Nurf is throwing a party.

Word spreads quickly, and by the bell to release classes for 2nd period rolls around, everyone already knows.

_BYOW, but drinks are provided. Come casual or dressed up._

Nikki, in her female Pinocchio costume, pretends to pull (grow) her nose when she tells Max she loves him. Max finds it hilarious.

David was dressed as David for 1st period, but the theatre kids must’ve gotten to him because he was Raggedy Andy when Max saw him again while walking Nikki to her 2nd period. Max thought his Wybie costume was better.

Mrs. Gwen visits David’s class in 5th period. David looks towards Max, daring him to make a comment, but Max points at his ‘sewn shut’ lips and winks.

He catches David staring at his mouth the rest of the period.

Ered doesn’t show up to the party.

*

This time, it’s David’s turn to help drunk Max.

He wasn’t plastered or anything, but he was having trouble standing up.

David was walking down the stairs when Max hiccuped from where he sat on the floor. 

“David~!” Max sings, “Help me up.”

David stalls for a second, probably to list the pros and cons of helping Max up when he was _very much attracted to Max_.

Or whatever.

David moves towards Max and holds out a hand. Max grabs ahold.

_He’s got soft skin,_ Max thinks, allowing David to pull him up.

“How did you get here?” David asks curiously.

“Uber, drunk driving is _bad_.”

David leads him to the stairwell.

“Okay, there’s a step there, don’t-- and you tripped.”

Max snorts but regains his footing.

“Why aren’t you drunk?” Max asks, “I thought you were a party animal.”

“I’ve got to teach class tomorrow.”

“Didn’t stop you last time.”

David gave him a look.

“That was different.”

Max looked at him back, slouching against the wall of the middle platform.

“How so?”

Silence.

_He’s got a nice face._

“It just is.”

_If he was drunk too, would he take the opportunity?_

Max pushes away from the wall slowly.

“Onward,” He babbles, moving towards the second row of stairs.

*

The coffee tastes like sadness and tears. 

They were parked in the parking lot of a Starbucks.

“What are you going to do about it?” Max asks Nikki finally.

His head was killing him.

“I _have_ to go.”

“But why do they want to see you?”

“To smear it in my face I can’t have their daughter.”

Max leans against the window and throws his legs over the middle console to poke Nikki with his foot. She looks up at him sadly.

Max knew something was wrong this morning when she picked him up crying. Luckily, David wasn’t around. Max refused to let Nikki drive to school with puffy eyes and demanded coffee. Which brought them to now, watching the sunrise as 1st period was going on. It felt distant like a whole different universe, as if he hadn’t been to school in years. All that mattered was Nikki, who was here, crying, and needed him _now._

Nikki’s phone was limp in her hand, on the screen, a message.

**Hi Nikki,**

**This is Mariah, Ered’s mother. It seems she’s been up all night on the phone with you again. We’re having family dinner this Sunday after church and we’d appreciate if you showed up. 5pm, you know the address.**

Max had tried to send them a long, angry message back, but Nikki wouldn’t allow it. She had given up. No matter what she did, Ered would be punished for it.

“Why can’t I just love her, Max? Why do they have to hate me? What did I _do?_ ”

“Nothing,” Max comforts. “You did not.a.single.thing wrong. They hate you for what you _are_ , not what you _did_ , and _they’re wrong_ , Nikki. They are _wrong_.”

_Why does it matter if she’s a girl too? Why? How does it affect them?_

Nikki puts her coffee in the cupholder, unable to hold it up without spilling while crying. Nikki was crushed.

Max was seething.

_Think. Think. Think._

Everything was backfiring. Why were they pretending to be straight together if it didn’t help anything?

“I have an idea,” Max tells Nikki at last.

She looks up at him, broken.

“Why don’t _we_ smear it in their face that you don’t want her?”

“But I want her.”

“I know you do, but what type a girl brings her _boyfriend_ to a family dinner?”

“A straight one??”

“Exactly,” Max says, winking, “I’m sure they won’t mind you bringing a plus one.”

“... I don’t know, Max.

“There’s no harm in trying, Nikki.”

When she looks at him again, there’s a glint of hope.

*

By the time the two of them return to school, the sky is crying as the tropical storm twists back around over their part of Texas. C lunch has already started, they’re soaked, but Nikki wants to collect her homework and see if Ered is at school. Max wishes her luck and decides to go bother David. 

The lunchroom is loud, but the sound fades as he walks deeper into the school building towards David’s class. He waves at the janitor with a hook hand, since he’s pretty sure the dude’s gonna flip one day and Max wants to be on his good side.

The door to David’s room is slightly ajar and Max peeks his head in. David’s back is to Max. Max slowly opens the door and makes his way over to David to scare him.

David screams like a little kid when Max’s hands grip his shoulders.

“Boo,” Max says, removing his hands and stepping away.

David clicks his phone screen off, Max catching a glimpse of himself.

He pretends to not have seen it.

“Can I get my 5 extra credit points?” Max asks smugly.

“Weren’t… weren’t you absent?”

“ _Weren’t._ Past tense. Now? I’m here.”

_I bet you like me being here._

_I like being here._

_Shush._

“Maybe you should be an English teacher,” David jokes, fiddling with his sleeves.

Max is staring at David’s phone, but David isn’t looking at him.

_Look at me, asshole, the real thing is right here._

Max pulls up a chair to David’s desk and sits down, leaning forward to get a look at David’s face.

David looks back at him nervously, “What?”

“Nothing, just can’t pass up the opportunity to bother my _favorite_ teacher,” Max taunts.

“Oh? And who’s that?”

“ _You_ ,” Max says, leaning back into his chair.

David’s face turns really red.

“Nikki would’ve been here too,” Max continues, watching David flinch, “But she was busy doing her own thing.”

David’s fingers were tapping the desk in sync with the rain. A flash of lightning lit up the sky. Both Max and David looked at the window, watching, breathing. Max stands first, moving towards the window. 

_Follow me._

He hears the annoying patter of the rolly chair and knows David followed after him.

Max leans his elbows against the little bookshelf next to the window.

“How peaceful,” Max says gently.

“You like the rain?”

“Sometimes more than the sun.”

The two stand and watch it rain until Max’s phone rings to a panicking, sobbing Nikki. 

“What’s wrong?” Max asks, concerned

“She’s not here!” 

Max hears thumps on the other line.

“Where are you?”

“Yearbook hall,” she whispers.

“Ok, ok, I’m coming.”

David is looking at Max, concerned. Max looks back at David and waves.

“I love you,” He tells Nikki, still looking at David.

Max hangs up the phone. David’s hands are clenched, he looks visibly upset, but he forces a smile.

“See you Monday,” Max tells David, then exits the class.

Finding Nikki was easy. Once he got to the dark yearbook hallway, all he had to do was following the crying.

Nikki hugs him harder than she ever has before. Harder than she hugged Max the day his grandpa died and he came sobbing to her because his grandpa had promised to take him in.

“It’s not fair,” She whispers now, the same as she did back then.

Max feels Nikki’s loss.

“I don’t think she’s coming back, Max…” Nikki tells him, “Her friends said she’s not coming back.”

_He’s not coming back, Max._ His mom had told him in one of her sober moments.

Death and love are very similar sometimes. Heartbreak was losing someone because they didn’t want you or because they weren’t allowed to. Death was losing someone for good.

Yet death seemed kinder somehow.


	7. Chapter 7

Max is busy making sure Nikki doesn’t do anything stupid for the next two weeks. He stays home with Nikki most days, doing what he can to comfort her and help her. The days Nikki and Max actually show up to school, she clings to him, emotionless. 

They didn’t show up to dinner at Ered’s, just send a ‘ ** _Where is she?’_ ** And receive a ‘ ** _Busy.’_ **in return.

They tried tracking her phone, but her location couldn’t ping. They sent the police her way, but they had nothing to show for. An angry text comes their way shortly after, calling Nikki a **_Bitch_ ** and a **_Faggot._ **

Max takes Nikki’s phone away and deletes the number.

He wanted to send hate their way, but there was no point.

Some people just wouldn’t listen.

They go through old yearbooks and Nikki’s photos one day, just looking at pictures of themselves before everything. Max cringes, remembering the way he used to look and act and Nikki laughs sometimes.

“I remember when you swallowed pop rocks and had a bunch of people on the bus listen to them pop."

“Really?” Max is mortified, “You were on the bus with me?”

“Yeah. I’ve known you a long time, Max, I guess longer than you thought.”

“That’s crazy. I didn’t know you existed until like… 4th grade.”

“I’ve known since 2nd grade when you punched that kid for making a Yo Mama joke to Jamie.”

“Sam?”

“Yeah.”

“I haven’t thought about that in so long… I wonder how Jamie’s doing.”

“I don’t know. I think he moved to Nebraska after that since his mom’s death was too hard on him.”

“You have a good memory,” He compliments.

“You know,” she says a few minutes later, “I used to sit at the same lunch table as you in middle school.”

“Really?” Max says, trying to recall her face, but he can’t.

“I sat at the other end, but I still sat at the same table. I studied you.”

“That’s not creepy at all.”

“Hey! I had suspicions you were gay. You liked Sebastian, didn’t you?”

Max blushes, “I did in 6th grade before I realized just how straight he was.”

“I knew the second I saw him that he was straight.”

“Ok, same, but I had hope otherwise.”

Nikki smiled.

“I know, I rooted for you…”

“Why didn’t you ever talk to me?”

Nikki has no answer.

“Do you like anyone now?” She says instead.

“... I’m not sure.”

“That’s not a no.”

“It’s not a yes either.”

*

Candy checks in on them occasionally, fearing the worst, maybe. But, it didn’t matter how many excuses she made to check the trash, there would be no pregnancy test, only tear stained tissues.

A few of those were Max’s. It was hard to not be hurting when his best friend was.

Neil texts a few times asking about their absence, but Max has nothing to tell him. A few days later, another text comes through from Nerris, telling them _**congrats!** _

Max doesn’t know what she’s going on about and ignores it. 

A text from an unknown number comes the following day to Nikki’s phone.

Nikki’s the happiest she’s been in 2 weeks. 

Max never got to read it, but Nikki let him know Ered was safe at her dad’s (plural! two!) house and that the police had gotten in contact with them following Max and Nikki’s call. Ered had to switch phone plans when she moved in with her dads. Her mom had violated the custody agreement for many years, but it had taken something (Nikki didn’t tell Max what) for her to finally be able to see and live with her dads.

Nikki dropped Max off at home late that night, thanking him for staying with her.

*

The next morning, Max runs into David in the hallway, leaving Mrs. Gwen’s again.

“Hi, David,” Max says, not his usual sing-songy way, tired.

“Max!” David sounds surprised to see him, “Are you doing good? Are you going to school?”

“Yeah, gotta walk though,” He knew Nikki would want to spend the whole day talking to Ered, so he texted her not to bother coming.

“In the rain?” David asks incredulously, walking beside Max to the stairwell door.

“I like the rain,” Max shrugs.

David holds the door open for Max. 

“I could give you a ride,” David offers after a second.

Max pauses, noting somewhere in the back of his head that they’re midway between the 1st and 2nd floor again.

“Ok,” Max accepts after a second, “Told you I’d get to see your car eventually.”

David flushes.

Driving with David was surprisingly nice once Max turned the radio off. David was pretty offended Max didn’t appreciate Farmers Almanac but the bitching from Max became too much and he eventually gave in. David bought them coffee from Mcdonalds and they spent most of the ride in a comfortable silence. Max watched the way the lines of David’s throat moved when he swallowed.

He had nice skin. A little bit of freckles never bothered anybody…

_Even his hands have freckles. That little group kind of looks like a triangle, you should find the missing angles._

Max feels a smirk pull at his lips.

_Guess you do like geometry, Max, you fiend._

“So,” David says at a stoplight, glancing towards Max’s hands, where they rest in his lap, “Where have you been?”

Max glances up at David through his eyelashes.

“With Nikki.”

David is still staring at his hands, so Max flexes his fingers, watching the way David blushes.

_Why’d he think he could stand being in a car alone with ME_.

“...”

“What?” Max asks crankily, “I can tell you want to ask something.”

“Nerris said you got hitched,” he blurts.

Max cries, not of sadness like he had been for 2 weeks, but of _laughter._

_Fucking Nerris!_

“... I’m guessing by your reaction, it’s not true then?”

“Far from it!”

_If only you knew._

David’s hand relax from where they were squeezing the steering wheel to death. Max holds a hand out to David.

David stares at it. Max shakes it like _take it_. David grabs it hesitantly, face boiling red. There’s a freckle on his middle finger.

“Look, no ring,” Max says at last.

David drops his hand like he’s been burned. David pointedly doesn’t look at Max for the rest of the car ride.

_I wonder why you even like me. I’m an asshole._

*

People hammer Max with ‘congrats!’ all day.

“I’m not married to Nikki.” Max always responds.

He feels like this whole thing is going too far.

When he walks alone in the hallway, people stare at him. They stare at his hands too. They stare at Nikki’s absence.

He hates the looks he receives.

He’s used to attention, but he feels naked without Nikki here to support him, but it’s better she isn’t here for the bullshit.

Mostly as the day continues.

The rumors flip from getting hitched to Nikki have secretly given birth to Max’s kid.

“She was looking a little chubbier…” He hears one girl whisper in 4th period.

The openly gay kid gives him strange looks and Max feels he _knows._

He doesn’t like being stared through.

Fuck french class.

Max never wished he was _out_ more than ever in this exact moment.

“She’s _NOT_ pregnant and has never been. We’re not engaged or married either,” Max tells the girl and everyone else who asks.

“If you’re not married or a dad, then where have you guys been?” Nerris asks in 5th.

“None of your damn business,” Max snaps, annoyed.

He knew she started these fucking annoying rumors.

The class all stares at him collectively.

Max was nice, or at least people believed he was. Maybe he wasn’t a dick like he used to be, maybe he was _nicer_ , but he was _not some fucking saint_.

“Take a picture, it lasts longer,” Max tells them.

Most of them look away, but some of the people Max has known longer smile apologetically at him. 

“... Moving on,” David says, trying to regain the attention of the class, “We’re going to start reading Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet starting Monday. We’re reading the modernized version by…”

Max zones out, chewing his pencil eraser.

David glances at him occasionally, worried.

_What am I supposed to tell Nikki?_

_*_

She doesn’t take it as badly as Max at first.

“It’ll pass,” She tells him.

*

At school the next day, they walk to the lunch room before 1st period as usual, maybe a little less “lovey dovey” since Max knows what’s up.

Nikki gives him a curious look but doesn’t make a move towards him.

Neil sees them first and he pales from where he’s sitting with Other Neil. A few other people glance up at them.

_How far have these rumors spread?_

“Nikki!” Nerris says, calling her over.

Max pointedly sits with the two Neils, but Nikki breaks out and goes to Nerris. She brushes her green hair behind her ear shyly as Nerris gushes over something. Nikki freezes, then shakes her head. Max sighs and looks away.

_Tried to warn you._

*

Nikki seems a little upset during 1st period.

“Why can’t people just stop fucking talking?” Nikki hisses to him.

~~A little~~ _A lot_ upset.

Max’s eyebrows raise, but he stays silent. Nikki doesn’t swear often.

“I don’t know, Nik.”

“Do you know who started this?”

“Nerris, probably.”

“I’m gonna give her a piece of my fucking mind tomorrow. She better fucking watch herself around--”

“Nikki, no violence,” Max jokes, “It’ll go away. We’ve dealt with this before.”

Sophomore year, Jacob Miller, the boy that started it all, tried to out Nikki after he caught Nikki and Ered at a party. 

Max threatened to out him right back if he didn’t take it back. Jacob took it back, but it was already out there. 

It was the scariest moment of Nikki’s life. Max and Nikki did a lot of making out in the lunchroom until the rumor disappeared.

Nikki is quiet for a bit.

“I guess.”

*

David welcomes Nikki back with a stack of homework. Max has already received his the day before, where it sits in his locker, where it was promptly lost to the birthday decorations he stuffed in there that he took off his locker.

Nikki immediately goes onto her phone when her and Max sit down. Max glances at the screen and quickly looks away when he sees ‘Ered’ on top of the screen. He gives her privacy.

David is reminding everyone about the Romeo and Juliet unit starting next week. Max tries to pay attention to the words coming out of David’s mouth, but he finds himself watching David’s hands gesturing in the air. Max tries to find the freckle, but he can’t recall which hand it was on.

_Soft hands._

He stops himself once he realizes what he’s doing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little shorter since I'm planning some stuff out, but Happy New Year!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise! Today's a special day, so here's another chapter for you!

“I think I’m gonna come out to my mom tonight,” Nikki tells him.

They’re parked in front of Max’s apartment building, eating Mcdonalds.

_Once it’s out, it’s out,_ Max wants to tell her, but she _knows_ that.

“Are you sure?” He asks, even though he knows what her response will be.

“Yes, I’m sure… I don’t want her thinking I’m what the rumors say.”

“She’s your mom, Nikki, she knows you’re not.”

“I think sometimes, she believes I am.”

Max knew it was tough on Nikki. Max could wreak havoc when he wanted to, since it’s not like his parents cared, but every single one of Nikki’s actions reflected onto her mother. Candy heard every rumor about her daughter, since her students always _had_ to ask her for the ‘truth.’

Candy didn’t know the truth.

“I’m scared, Max.”

“... I think she won’t care. I _know_ she won’t. I see it myself, Nikki, she’s not homophobic and I _would_ know if she was.”

Max had seen disgust in his parents’ eyes many times, especially when gay marriage was legalized in 2014. They sat him down and told him to not believe the lies being spewed about how it was _‘normal,’_ cause it _‘wasn’t.’_ They told him the world was a scary place nowadays, with how _‘faggots’_ could run around and be _recognized._

Max thought people like his parents were what made the world scary.

People like Candy’s boss.

Sometimes, Max scared himself too.

Before Nikki found him out, he was self destructive. No matter how much he tried to play it off to himself, as much as he pretended not to care, he was terrified of everyone finding out. When Nikki caught him with Jacob, he was trembling inside.

All it took was one person telling his parents for him to be kicked out…

But now, he knew Nikki would take him in. It took 3 years, but he found _his_ family.

“Y’know… if you want to stop being my beard…” Nikki says instead of responding to his reassurance.

Max looks at her. It’s the second time she’s mentioned it. 

“Do you want me to?”

“It’s your call, Max. It’s always been your call, but I feel like _I’m_ holding you back,” she whispers, “I have someone I love, someone who _knows_ about ‘us’, but you only have _me_. When school ends, I’ll do everything I can to get her and live with her, but you never got the chance to meet someone because you’ve ‘been’ with me since you started high school. Don’t you feel lonely?”

Max sighs and stares at the fries he held in front of his mouth. 

“Sometimes,” he admits, “But how would we end it? A big fight?”

Nikki laughs, “No, just… stop. No kissing, no flirting, no hand holding, no cheesy ‘I love you’s.’ Just be who we are, y’know?”

Max nods, “Ok…”

“I _am_ gonna come out to my mom tonight,” She tells him.

*

She calls him that night.

“Are you ok?” He says immediately.

“Yeah,” She’s crying. 

“I take it she didn’t take it well.”

“No,” She says and Max prepares his apology, “She took it well.”

Max feels relief crash through him.

“So why are you crying?”

“Because I convinced myself she wouldn’t. I told myself she would hate me for _years,_ Max… But she loves me.”

“I’m happy for you.”

“She’s a little upset though.”

“Why?”

“Ca-”

Max hears a knock on the other line.

“Yeah? Max. Ok. Ok. I know. I understand. I’ll let him know. Ok. I love you too, mom. Goodnight.”

“Your mom?” He asks once he’s sure she’s alone.

“Yeah. She wants me to invite you over for dinner tomorrow.”

“Why?”

“I’ll tell you tomorrow, but I gotta go, Ered’s calling.”

“Ok?” He says to the end tone.

Max curls up alone in his bed, staring at his phone screen.

He feels so proud of his friend.

*

Max’s clothes are still damp, but Nikki is blowing up his phone telling them they’re going to be late if he doesn’t hurry up. He sighs and pulls them on, cringing at the wet feeling.

David is by Gwen’s door, on his phone.

_Is he waiting for me?_

Max makes a show of locking his door as loudly as he can. In his peripheral, he can see David flinch and tuck his phone into his pocket, putting his hand on Gwen’s door handle.

Max checks the time on his phone.

6:50.

School starts at 7:10.

Max usually leaves at 6:35 on the dot.

_He’s waiting for me._

_Shush._

_No he’s not._

Max says hi to David, both of them pretending it was a coincidence.

_He totally is though._

“Running late?” Max asks, laughing.

David falls in step with Max.

_It’s kinda cute._

“Yeah, my phone didn’t charge last night,” David says, showing his phone which is definitely low on battery.

“Oooh,” Max says suggestively, taking the stairs two at a time.

Max reaches out for the phone and, strangely, David hands it to him, seeming distracted. 

Nikki honks from outside.

“Shit,” Max says, “I can’t be late.”

David laughs and rushes outside with Max at his tail.

“See you 5th, David,” Max says, rushing to the passenger side.

David lets him, doesn’t even try to stop him.

_I’ve got his phone._

_*_

Max and Nikki walk to class together like normal, but they don’t hold hands. In fact, they stand a little farther apart than usual.

David’s phone is a heavy weight in his pocket.

“So, what time do you want me coming over tonight?” Max asks Nikki.

“5. Come casual, _NO_ flowers or anything.”

“Ooh, picky,” He teases, entering the classroom ahead of her.

She jabs him in the back.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.”

The bell immediately rings the second after Nikki steps into the class.

The teacher glances at them through her glasses, looking displeased.

_Be lucky I even showed up._

“We have a new seating chart,” Ms. Powers tells them, pointing at the board.

Their names are set at different sides of the class.

“Ok, cool,” Max says nonchalantly, not putting up the fuss everyone probably expected him to.

_It’s over now, no more pretending._

Nikki similarly brushes off the issue and they separate. 

When Max sits down, he glances at Nikki to see she’s doing the same.

“Alright,” The teacher says, “Today we’re watching a video on chemical changes…”

*

Max walks Nikki to 2nd period, if only to walk past David’s classroom.

He feels David’s gaze.

_He knows,_ Max thinks, _He knows I have his phone._

He glances up.

_Green eyes, red hair. Stupid smile, ‘teacher of the year’ last year. His eyes that always watch. Watch him chew his pencil. The eyes that watched him kiss Nikki. The mouth that kissed his own. The voice that spoke passionately in class. The voice that asked ‘why did it have to be you?’ His cheeks that blush when he’s caught staring or when Max says something suggestive. The fear and sadness when Max said ‘I love you’ to Nikki._

_The hands that gripped the rose tightly. The stupid jorts that grip his legs. The feet he stumbled over drunk. The way he stuttered over the dirty Kahoot names. The freckle on his finger and triangular freckles on his dominant hand. His warm, soft hands hesitantly grabbing his. The hands that supported him as Max drunkenly needed help up the stairs. The stairs Max found David on the night everything started._

And if Max doesn’t go over there now and return the phone, it’s _all over._ This game.

Max makes his choice.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did I say about it being a special day?
> 
> I feel like this chapter is gonna be super confusing, but I couldn't think of any other way to write it. I rewrote it at least 5 different times, but nothing seems right.
> 
> Thank you all for the lovely comments! They keep me motivated to write and honestly make my day.

“You stole his phone? Max!” Nikki says.

They stand by the gum pole. Nikki is in her PE uniform. Max ditched french.

“Relax,” Max tells her, leading her to the gate they crossed through on the first day, “He’ll get it back once I go through it.”

“Not with me here, you’re not.”

“Why? Aren’t you curious?”

“Ok, ok,” Nikki gives in immediately, as if she was doing him a favor by allowing him to snoop with her.

_David knows. David knows. He watched me leave with his phone. He couldn’t even do anything about it either. I’m in charge._

They walk down the middle of the road, tracing the yellow lines. The neighborhood is quiet, asleep. No dogs bark in the distance, no birds sing. Max hears Nikki breathing, feels himself doing the same.

_I could stop breathing right now and never know the truth._

Max shakes away the intrusive thought. He cuts through the overgrown soccer field, avoiding stepping on the flower patches, and steps up onto the wood chips of the playground. The two of them sit side-by-side on the swings.

Nikki brushes her hair behind her ear and allows Max a moment as she swings gently back and forth. Max was ready, sure, but he was anxious. He wanted this… confusion to end, but not knowing what he would see was terrifying. People are afraid of the unknown.

Max clicks the screen (no longer cracked like it was the night he was drunk) on and stares at the lock screen. _It’s a pine tree._ He swipes to the side to get to the password screen, but there’s no password.

“What an idiot.”

Nikki digs her shoes into the wood chips to stop her slow swings. She leans over slowly, giving him time to decide whether this was something he wanted to keep private from her or not. He allows her to peer at the screen.

_Candy crush, YouTube, boring stuff._

_Camera roll…_

Max pulled it up and Nikki covers her eyes real quickly.

“What are you doing?”

“What if it’s a nude?” She whines.

“It’s not.”

“BUT it could’ve been.”

“Well, then maybe I should go through it at home.”

“No! Do it now please.”

Max smirks and tilts the screen a little towards her so she can see it a little clearer. He doesn’t know if he can do this alone. Luckily, it’s just a picture of a book cover of the stupid play they’re doing on Monday. He skips through the first few recent photos, but they’re just pictures of the lesson plan.

“Check recently deleted,” Nikki whispered, then changed her pitch, “ _What?_ Who said that? Not me.”

Max clicked back to the albums page and began to prepare himself mentally for a bunch of dick pics. David _seemed_ innocent enough, but he’s a guy. Max is a guy too.

_Is he gay?_ Max wonders for the first time. _Or is it just me?_

He took a few deep breaths, then clicked on the album marked _recently deleted_. He quickly averted his eyes, nervous. After a few seconds, of which the phone didn’t blow up or fill the air with moaning, he looks at the screen. It’s just a blurry photo of David and Mrs. Gwen taken by Mrs. Gwen. David is crying on a sofa as Gwen stands in front of him doing a peace sign. Max swipes.

David and Gwen. Messy red hair. ~~Pretty _pretty_ ~~green eyes.

David and Gwen. Champagne bottle. The date at the top says it’s from August. Max remembers the way time skipped all the way home that night.

Max.

In fact, _lots_ of Max. There are screenshots of Nikki’s Instagram posts, a picture of Max typing in the password of the apartment keypad outside that Max didn’t even know David took. Max distinctly remembers that as the night David kissed him ‘cause Max is wearing his beanie in that photo.

_He totally stole my beanie._

Pictures of Max and Nikki kissing from Nikki’s Instagram again from their 2nd year anniversary last year. Max silently judges himself. The photo is so staged, but everyone was congratulating them, telling them how happy they looked and how cute they were.

Nikki eventually took the phone from Max’s hands and scrolled for him. They paused on various moments of the two of them together, stolen from Nikki’s Instagram or photos of them in the yearbook. Most times than not, Nikki would be cropped out. 

Max didn’t know how to feel.

“Do you think he knows it’s all fake?” Nikki asks quietly.

“No.”

“Here,” she whispers, handing the phone back. “You good?”

“Yeah,” he whispers back, continuing to scroll through.

Max’s locker, decorated for his birthday. The timestamp is from the night before.

_So David did it?_

Not every deleted photo is of Max. There are pictures of David in college with, who Max assume are, his roommates. There are pictures of the school principal, Campbell. There’s a picture of the ‘teacher of the year’ award hung proudly next to a family photo of redheads. There are pictures of a man Max learns is named Jasper through a Target name tag.

He goes to David’s favorited photos. It’s mostly family photos, but there’s one of Max, _only_ one, but it stands out from all the rest of them. It’s a screenshot of a photo Max posted on his Instagram before he made it private. It’s a picture of Max smiling on his 17th birthday.

A real smile.

The realest it’s ever been. 

Max had spent the whole day crying over his grandpa’s death, even though it had been a little over a month ago at that point. To top it off, his parents forgot his birthday. He stormed off to Nikki’s and she let him in without a question. She brought him food and let him cry to her about his life. It was the most he opened up to anyone in years.

His anger towards his parents living off of money sent to them by his grandpa (then later his inheritance.) Anger towards them for smoking in the house and disappearing all day, only to come home drunk, if at all. Anger towards himself for being unloved. Anger towards himself for being gay.

Things had been awkward between them before that day, but he felt all of it melt away with each confession. For the first time in his life, he felt _loved._ _Loved_ in the way his parents hadn't made him feel. _Loved_ even with the way his head was screwed up and _loved_ through the anger and resentment he held towards his those who wronged him. _Loved_ the way his stupid middle school girlfriend hadn’t made him feel when she had called him a faggot. Loved the way he never felt while suicidal. 

Loved the way he never loved himself.

He felt like he was home. And when he was done crying about himself, Nikki laid with him on the couch and told him about growing up with a mom who brought home strange men. About her mom being so fucked up on drugs, she didn’t even care about her daughter. About her mom deciding to sober up after years of neglect. About forming a tentative relationship with her mom. About being so proud of her mom for being clean enough to get a job. About her actions (her feelings) ruining her mom’s career, meeting Ered, Ered’s parents. She told Max about popping excessive amounts of Xanax and falling asleep in the bathtub. About dropping out of cheer because it took up time she could spend with Ered. About wishing to be young again. Silly little things like what one of her friend’s favorite colors was in kindergarten.

The two of them cried. 

Then they laughed and smiled, and Nikki took a picture of Max smiling at her with swollen eyes. She asked permission to post it since he had been crying, but no one had really noticed. It was the smile after years of pain being unloaded.

Max gently stroked the screen, wiping at his own tears on the screen. A low battery notification pops up and he laughs a little, feeling a little low himself.

“Max?” Nikki asked. 

“Sorry, just remembering something.”

“What are you going to do about it?” Nikki asks him finally.

“About David?”

“Yeah.”

_Did I find what I wanted?_ Max wonders, staring at the phone.

“I… I honestly don’t know.”

“He’s obviously got a thing for you.”

“… I kind of like the attention,” Max admits quietly.

“Do you like him?”

_Do I? Or do I like that he likes me?_

Max doesn’t answer.

“So what are you going to do?”

_End this. I’m so, so tired._

Max says firmly, “I’m gonna confront him.”

*

They snuck back into the building easily. All he had to do was wave at someone ditching class inside and they let him in. Nikki had headed back to the track, where they could hear her class blasting music from the stands. 

Max doesn’t bother heading back to 4th period with only a few minutes left on the clock. Instead, he slips into one of the more secluded bathrooms and stares himself down in the mirror.

_Fix your hair. You look tired. You need to take care of yourself more. You look scrawny. Eat more._

Max pulls David’s phone back out once he’s finished straightening out his appearance. He scrolls through it once more, quickly. 

_I didn’t make this up. This is real. The proof didn’t disappear… it’s right here._

The bell rings and Max tenses.

_Why am I nervous?_

He exits the bathroom and slowly makes his way to class. 

_Can’t be the first one there_.

He enters just after the late bell rings.

David looks at him with a frown as he enters and opens his mouth to say something. _Probably thought I was Nurf, he’s always late_. Max isn’t sure what expression he, himself, is making, but whatever it looks like, it causes David to backpedal. Then Max sees the expression on his face melt and mold into a sad one. His eyebrows furrow, his lips are simultaneously up and down in a sad sort of smile. 

_It’s over. He knows it’s over. He knows I saw it._

Max shakes himself from his stupor.

_Now is not the time to stare._

_Act like nothing happened. You’re good at pretending._

“Sorry, there was a fight in the stairwell,” Max lies, staring at David.

_Who’s gonna break eye contact first?_

“A fight?” Harrison asks along with a few others, standing up.

They rush the door but Max feels a warmth at his back and Nurf brushes past him.

“It’s already over,” Nurf lies and closes the door behind him.

Max turns to look at Nurf, the stare broken.

“Well I’m glad you’re unhurt,” David tells them and gestures for them to sit down. 

**_Are you good?_ **Nikki texts him.

Max flashes her a thumbs up and smiles halfheartedly. When he looks back at the front of the classroom, David is watching.

For the rest of class, he doesn’t look at Max again.

Nikki doesn’t stay behind when the bell rings, just shoots him a look and leaves.

Max had imagined this conversation for _months_ now, yet nothing comes from his mouth. There is no yelling, no taunting, no threats.

As Max stands before David’s desk, David’s phone in hand, there’s only silence. 

David won’t even look at him.

“Why?” Max asks at last.

_Why did you kiss me? Why have you been asking Nikki about me since last year? Why me out of everyone?_

David doesn't answer him at first and Max asks the question again in a louder voice.

_“Why?”_

“I promised myself **I would** **_never_ ** **lay a hand on a student,** ” David answers instead, “I didn’t even think I needed to make that promise because I _never_ thought I’d think of a student as more than a name…”

“Yeah, well **you did**.”

David looks confused for a second.

_“Why’d it have to be you?_ ” Max taunts.

And it finally comes back.

“The stairwell…” He murmurs, “I’m so sorry… I was drunk, I didn’t know what I was doing or thinking--”

_Don’t brush me off, asshole. Fucking LOOK AT ME._

“So why did it have to be me? Why’d you do it, then? ‘Cause you obviously knew what you were doing. You _pinned_ me to the _wall._ That doesn’t seem like an accident.”

David has no answer. Max chews his lip.

“Since when?” Max asks.

_I didn’t even know you until this year, basically._

“Since your freshman year.”

Max says nothing for a minute, stunned

_He’s been watching me a long time. I never noticed. I thought I was pretty aware of my surroundings..._

“Why?”

_What did I do to attract your attention? How much do you know about me?_

“I spilled my stuff…”

_Spilled your--?_

Max remembered suddenly.

It was the day he met Nikki. He was leaving tutorials (since he didn’t want to go home at 2:50, only to come back at 5 for the game) and was in the hallway. He was one of the only ones still in the building, as the game had already started. He could hear the stupid school anthem being blasted through the walls. He was heading down the stairs, David was already on the first floor, walking towards the main entrance. He was on his phone, or doing something that took his attention away. He tripped over his own feet, and all his papers sprayed everywhere. Max had reached the bottom of the steps and he would feel guilty if he just ditched the dude. He could probably get in trouble if they checked the cameras… so Max helped.

“You helped me pick up all the papers, then rushed off to the stadium… I thought you looked kinda sad, so I decided to watch the game and see if I could thank you.”

Max had rushed off to go find Jacob, who was texting him, asking where he was. Max had been teasing him for weeks, flirting and touching him, but never enough to be pushy, just enough to get him interested. Max wasn’t even interested, he just wanted attention. He just wanted to destroy himself. He wanted everyone to find out, to hate him the way his parents told him he (‘faggots’) should be hated. Jacob snuck off to meet him by the locker rooms. When they started making out, Max felt something in him click into place. He was gay and nothing was going to change about that. He didn’t feel disgust... then Nikki came over after one of her cheer teammates accidentally busted her lip while warming up (Nikki was always uncoordinated.)

And Max lost the chance to explore this version of himself that he _knew_ existed, but that stayed hidden.

Once they decided to be each other’s beard, the two of them headed back to the football field together. It was normal for freshman relationships to end quickly. Even though Nikki had been dating Jacob just seconds before, now she was coming back with another guy, no longer wearing Jacob’s jersey.

_Look at how easy it is to be ‘straight,’ how easy it was to be accepted._

“...And I remember thinking ‘oh, of course he has a girlfriend.’” Max felt something in him ache at David’s mumbled words, “I checked up on you occasionally. I wanted to thank you, but you were always around _her_ and I could never find the opportunity, since I know high schoolers want to seem cool but _cold_ too… not have some lame teacher give them attention… it kind of just evolved from there.”

“So, what? You want to ruin my relationship?” Max sneered, but inside he was curious, “Give yourself a chance?”

_What does he want from me? What is it he’s looking for that he sees in me?_

“No, no, NO,” David raises his head and looks at Max for the first time, “My class kept gossiping about you and Nikki. You both seemed to be quite popular. I kept seeing you at games until Nikki quit cheer. I was happy you two were happy. I would _never_ want to interrupt or sabotage what you have. I never tried to do that… it just happened.”

_Something’s off._

“So you _stalked_ me basically?”

“No,” David said, fiddling with his fingers, “I just wanted to make sure you were happy… and you were.”

_He’s jealous._

_Something’s off._

_What is it?_

“That’s not very convincing, since Nikki said otherwise. Said you asked around about me. I mean, even your _phone is_ _proof_ of that,” Max clicked on David’s phone and pulled up his recently deleted. “Look! Me! Me! ME! ME! It’s almost ALL of ME!”

“No, it wasn’t _like that,”_ David buried his face in his hands, “You love this girl… I can see that. I didn’t _want_ to like you. I still don’t want to. You’re _happy_ . And it hurts and I’m SORRY. I _know_ I’m **disgusting** for liking you and if you want to report me, go ahead. If you want me to quit, I will. If you want me to confess, I will! I _never_ wanted to lay my hand on you!”

_I’m not happy… That’s it… that’s what’s off._

_He loves the version of me I portray… not me._

“Look at me!” Max snaps.

_Look at the real me. I’m awful. I knew about your feelings. I played with you. I’m a liar._

David looks at Max. He is crying, honest to god _crying._

_I told you I’d break you._

**It doesn’t feel as good as Max thought it would...**

_Look at me, I’m_ **_‘disgusting’_ ** _too._

“You’re stupid,” Max sneers, but he means it more towards himself, “You’re honestly _so fucking_ stupid.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t like _me,_ you don’t even know me!”

“I know...”

“No, you honestly don’t know how much you don’t. You think you know me enough to like me? Well, you FUCKING DON’T. Everything is FAKE!” Max spits.

He takes a deep breath, and says probably _the most cliche thing_ he’s _ever_ said, but it’s out:

“I’m not nice like I pretend to be; I’m a fucking dick. You think I’m wrong? _Then find me_ : my _secrets,_ my _life._ Find out the fucking _truth_ , ‘cause just looking at you spout nonsense about some falsified version of me _you think you know_ is insulting.”

_Look at me. Find the real me. Realize you hate me._

Max slammed David’s phone onto the desk, standing up.

_Realize maybe you could love me still._

“I’ll start you off: I’m gay.”

Once it’s out, _it’s out._

_It’s out. It’s out. It’s out._

Max escapes the room, leaving David in a stunned silence.

*

In the car, Max cries in frustration. Nikki lets him. 

_Why do I feel like I just broke my own heart?_

“I’m sorry…” Nikki whispers, hugging him.

_She knew I liked him, didn’t she?_

“It’s not your fault I’m upset,” He tells her, sucking up his tears and clearing his throat.

He wants to tell her things, but his head is muddled. He doesn’t know what he wants to say.

“So dinner?” He changes the subject.

“Yeah, dinner.”

She looks sad that he shut her out.

“What’s it about?”

“I think she’s still convinced the 2 of us are meant to be, though… I want her to give up on us…”

“Thus dinner?”

Max understands. He wants their ‘relationship’ to end too. Not just for themselves (as it technically did last night), but for others too. He wants others to _forget about them._


	10. Chapter 10

Max shows up at Nikki’s door around 5pm, feet aching from his feet having outgrown his shoes again. He sighs at the realization that he’s growing again. These shoes served him well the last year and a half and his clothes were getting smaller too these last few months. 

Candy opens the door, “Come in, Max. She’s upstairs.”

“Thank you, Candy,” Max says politely.

“Tell Nicolette that dinner will be ready in a few minutes, please. And I’m very sorry, Max.”

_Ouch. Full name. She’s upset._

Max nods and heads upstairs quickly enough to escape Candy’s wrath, but not fast enough to make it seem like he’s escaping. Parents scare him.

At the top of the stairs is the game room, where Neil once sat, doing homework.

_That felt like years ago._

He stares at the empty spot.

_I wonder how he’s doing…_

Max was really close to Neil in middle school, but really fell off once high school rolled around. Middle school Neil was mischievous. He was smart, sure, but he didn’t mind using it for ‘evil.’ They used to set off homemade stink bombs in the woods behind Neil’s house. The rancid smell would haunt the woods for weeks. Neil had even been to Max’s apartment. He thought it was cool Max had the house to himself.

High school Neil cared about scholarships. His crush on Nikki really drew a wedge between them after Nikki and Max started ‘dating.’ Neil never said anything to Max about it, but Max knew he hurt him by ‘stealing’ his crush. He ignored the bro code.

Max wondered, if after everything, Neil would allow things to go back to normal or if the damage was done.

“Is she mad?” Nikki asks when he enters her room.

“Yes ma’am.”

Nikki groans and throws herself back onto the bed, sideways so her feet dangle. Max lays down besides her on the bed, almost his whole body dangling off her tiny twin bed. The ceiling fan spins overhead, seemingly sucking in their attention for a moment. Max tries to track one of the fan blades with his eyes, but it’s going too fast. Dizzy, he looks at Nikki. 

Nikki continues to stare at her ceiling, expressionless. Max knows this is hard on her.

Coming out was one of the most nerve wracking experiences ever. Mostly if you’ve been raised with homophobic parents or parents that never voice what they think. The ones that never voiced their opinion could turn out to be just as, or if not more, homophobic. Max didn’t know what he would have done if Nikki got kicked out, other than to try his hardest to get her to Ered.

After coming out to your parents, then you have to come out to your cousins, uncles, aunts, and other old (possibly homophobic) relatives. Their reactions don’t typically matter as much if you’re not close to them, but a bad reaction could make you unable to go to any family events or holidays. 

Then, came school. A group of people who know you (sometimes more than your own family) can choose whether or not they accept you. The reason you _always_ do the school last is because there’s _always_ a snitch. They will always track down your family and tell them. Besides the snitch, there’s typically a good reaction from most people (depending on where you live, because Max would never trust anyone from the deep south) **but** Max and Nikki were ‘straight’ together for 3 years, and the reaction they feared was _‘how gay can you actually be?’_

_Very_ , but others may not see it that way. They could see it as attention seeking or something.

The issue with Nikki is that her mom _knows_ but _doesn’t understand._ Nikki has appeared as straight as can be these last 3 or more years-- long enough that people started to talk about marriage --and as far as she’s aware, Nikki quit cheer to spend more time with _Max,_ not _Ered._

Nikki finally looks at Max, who has been staring at her. She smiles and then groans.

“This is gonna be _so_ awkward!” Nikki scrubs her face with her hands, determination set on her face, “But I gotta do this... For Ered.”

*

Candy made hamburger helper.

There was a reason they usually ordered takeout…

She had the table set already, the hot saucepan on an oven mitt. She allowed Max to serve himself first, since he was the ‘guest,’ and he fidgeted under her stare. 

Candy made peaceful small talk about grades and future plans. Max pretended he knew what he wanted to do for a living like he always did. She asked him about his family and Max lied about them being out of town like always.

He hated this. He knew she was building up to whatever she was going to say. He filled his plate with seconds and tried to go for thirds, but there was nothing left in the saucepan. Candy stood up and grabbed the saucepan, disappearing into the kitchen.

Nikki’s eyes met his.

“Don’t worry. You don’t need to say anything, I got this,” she tells him.

He’s not sure what she’s ‘got.’

Candy emerges from the kitchen and Max stands up with his plate. He hears them whispering behind him but pretends he doesn’t. He takes his time washing and drying his plate until it starts to feel like he’s taking a suspiciously long time.

He steels himself to head back into that awkward mess, but knows he can’t ditch Nikki there.

“So, Max,” Candy says when he enters the dining room again, “Do you plan on marrying my daughter.”

“Mom!” Nikki shouts.

_Is she testing me on what I know?_

Max laughs awkwardly, looking at Nikki. When she looks back at him, she subtly shakes her head.

_No? Like say no? Or don’t say anything? Or ‘no yes.’_

Max ends up going with the second option, just nervously flicking his gaze between Nikki and Candy. He slowly moves towards the table and forces himself to sit down, even though he’s feeling _flighty._

“I… feel like I’m missing something?” Candy says.

_Me too. Nikki forgot to tell me about it._

“He knows, mom,” Nikki says.

“About you and…? Or that you’re…”

“Both.”

Candy looks at Max for a few seconds before he realizes she wants him to answer.

“Both,” Max pipes up, “I’ve known the whole time.”

Nikki looks at him, biting her lip. She leans in close and whispers to him.

“You don’t need to say anything,” Nikki says gently.

“No, don’t worry about it,” He responds, glancing at Candy “I’ll just tell her.”

Candy is staring at them, twiddling her thumbs. Max feels something in him shift. She’s _nervous_ not _angry._

“I’ll tell her I’m gay. It’s not a big deal, dude. She’s not my mom…”

_Feels like one though._

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

Max never imagined what it would feel like to come out to someone he considers family. He knew his parents would react by locking him out the house and tossing his shit out the second story window (if they decided to give him his stuff back.) Candy was his ‘girlfriend’s’/best friend’s mom. Candy was a teacher. Candy a safe space. In his junior year, while Nikki was in class while he was eating lunch because they had different lunch periods, Max would sometimes hang out in Candy’s room and help her with things. It got to the point a few of his annoying classmates would sing a rendition of _“Stacy’s mom”_ except _Stacy_ was replaced with _Nikki._

So, sitting here in front of Candy who watched him grow up into the man he was today, he felt himself choke as he told her, “I’m gay.”

“You’re what?” Candy says.

“I’m gay,” Max repeats.

She looks between Nikki and him, her face contorting into the most confused expression he’s ever seen. Max gets it, honestly. Finding out your daughter is a lesbian, despite her long term boyfriend, then finding out he’s gay, despite his long term girlfriend, is not a situation parents typically have to prepare for.

“Ok, now I feel like I’m _really_ missing something.”

Max and Nikki tell her everything.

It takes an hour, filled with backtracking and talking over each other, but by the end of it, Candy seems to understand that they were _never_ in love.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” She asks.

Max stays silent. This isn’t his place to speak.

“Because I didn’t want you to hate me…”

“You know I could never hate you, Nikki.”

“I _didn’t_ know that, mom… and I didn’t want to have you to lie to your boss about me since I know they’re always attacking _you_ for the things _I_ do.”

“So you lied _to me_ instead?”

“I didn’t want you getting fired…”

“You don’t need to lie for me, Nikki. If they fire me, I’ll sue them. I can just transfer districts. This is _about you_ , not _me_ . You don’t need to _hide_ from me. You do it for yourself, babe. I know I was never really around when you were younger, but I’m here now and I want to support you, but I can’t do that if you’re hiding things like this from me. So, if my daughter has a girlfriend, then I want to know so I can brag about it to all the stupid PTA moms and my coworkers.”

Nikki laughs sadly.

“And Max,” Max looks up, cringing, “I’m not sure what your situation at home is fully, and I’ve no intention in forcing it out of you, but I understand this isn’t something you want them finding out, from what you’ve told me… But just know: I love you like my own son, and I know you care about my daughter, but I want you to be happy. I can’t imagine you were very happy while _playing house_ with my daughter.”

Max doesn’t respond verbally, just nods. He doesn’t know if her words were supposed to hold a bite, but feels like someone sunk teeth in.

“My job means nothing to me if my two babies aren’t happy. I haven’t always been a good parent, and I still struggle sometimes, but in the end my family is what matters most to me. If you want to come out publicly, don’t let me stop you. These are your lives and your futures, and I, or _anybody else_ for that matter, don't have any right to stop you from living them.”

Max nods.

“You’re welcome back here, always, Max. If you need a place...”

Max thanks her.

*

Max declines the ride home from Nikki, instead choosing to walk. He regrets it as soon as he reaches the halfway mark and feels a blister forming. He makes the tough decision to toss his shoes in someone’s trash can and destroy his socks. He sighs in frustration, since his feet had been mostly fine while walking to her house earlier, but he guesses that _sometimes_ , it becomes a little too much.

With each step closer to his apartment, his heart beats harder and harder.

Dinner went _well,_ but his heart still hurts.

Candy loves her daughter so much and she cares for him too, she even let him come out to her for gods sakes… but he doesn’t get it. He doesn’t get why everything still hurts like he’s been rejected. Maybe it’s because she isn’t blood (he doesn’t think that’s it) or maybe it’s because, at the end of the day, he always ends up alone back at the apartment. He plays the good boyfriend part all day, then goes home and it all crumbles away. He lays in bed, numb, and wakes up again to play the part again.

Honestly, now that his ‘role’ is gone, he doesn’t even know who he is anymore. Who is he supposed to be now?

He types in the door code and enters the building, feeling the warm blast of AC. It’s been getting a little colder out recently.

_Will Nikki still pick me up?_

He doesn’t know, but he decides he needs to wash his thicker jackets soon just in case. He can’t always depend on Nikki.

He stops on the platform between the 1st and 2nd floor, staring at the wall. He remembers back to being high out of his mind and feeling his world shift so suddenly. He wonders what would have happened if he hadn’t pushed David away.

He shakes his head and starts heading to the second flight of stairs. He pushes the door at the top of the stairs open for himself and wanders down the hallway alone. It’s not the first time he’s doing it alone (he does it every night) but today, it feels different. He’s so utterly aware of himself and just how goddamn alone he is.

He unlocks the door to his apartment and goes to enter it, but he pauses. He hears voices, or _yelling._

_My parents are home._

He peeks his head into the apartment slowly, making sure to make no noise. They’re standing in the living room and kitchen, not facing the door. He debates whether he should take the risk to grab a pair of his shoes from where they sit by the door.

_I need some fucking shoes._

Max cringes and he grabs the ones he wore this morning for school. Like he’s been burned, he jerks his hand out of the apartment with his shoes in hand. He slowly closes the door and locks it.

Then he backtracks. He doesn’t risk putting the shoes on outside the apartment just in case they decide to leave. Instead, he rushes down the hall and down the stairs, blasting out of the building. He debates whether to call Nikki to come get him. 

There’s a difference in being told _“if you need a place to stay”_ to go to them than actually taking them up on it.

Max sighs and, after a long debate, calls Neil instead.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short filler chapter.

“Max?” Neil says, “What’s up?”

Max was surprised Neil even showed up to get him. He was surprised Neil had even  _ answered _ the phone. He was surprised Neil had his number _ still _ saved on his phone. He feels some sort of relief wash through him.

He takes a deep breath, swallowing down the emotions he feels suddenly trying to pour out.

“Are you busy?” He asks.

“No, I’m just laying in bed, why?”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, dude, I’m not busy??”

Max tries to choke back a sob.

“C-can you come get me?”

He hears Neil shuffle in the background, realizing Max was upset.

“Sure, where?”

Max can’t answer for a second, trying to swallow down all the noises wanting to come out. He feels a single tear streak down from his right eye.

“Your place?” Neil asks instead.

Max hums and Neil talks to him gently, telling him he’s on his way and that he’ll be there in 10 minutes. Max gives him permission to hang up.

A lady walking her dog looks at him, a figure in the darkness of the night, his hood up, and she crosses the street. A group a middle schoolers pass by shortly after and Max smells the weed they carry. He’s glad the sun is long down, since his left eye decided to play catch up with the right one and started dropping tears like a bombshell.

He needs his bag. Fuck.

This time it’s not David’s car that’s horribly out of place in this little shithole area of town, but Neil’s. Neil’s dad had struck it rich a few years back, which is what brought upon the awkward sleepovers where they got stuck listening to Neil’s dad getting it. Those nights, Max thought him and Neil would be friends forever. They hadn’t hung out (just the two of them) in 3 years. It may not seem long, but they had been freshman, shoved into an entirely new environment, still thinking that high school would be driving to the beach, setting off fireworks, falling in love with someone they just met who was magically their soulmate, and camping in the woods and getting drunk.

Now, they were seniors. Life was passing by quickly, it was already mid November, and finals would be coming up in a month, then the year would be halfway over already. Then it would college applications, more testing, stressing over grades and credits, then they would walk… then they would pack up and leave home and go to school again and get married and have a family. Maybe Max was getting ahead of himself, but the point is, they were two entirely different people from the people they were 3 years ago. They were children, but now they were dancing on the edge of adulthood. But...

But here Neil was, sitting in park as Max pulled himself into the car (with his backpack, since he went back to the apartment to get it despite every part of him screaming otherwise,) feeling the weight of the world crashing down on him.

A fucking Corvette! Neil was 14 the last time they hung out and he sure as hell couldn’t drive.

“Are you good?” Neil asked him once he was buckled up.

Max hummed, but he stared out the passenger window, on the brink of a breakdown.

Today was tough on him emotionally and it just  _ keeps repeating _ . Starting with waking up late, sitting in wet clothes, David, David’s phone, more annoying talking from his classmates about him and Nikki, the impending dinner at Nikki’s weighing on him all day, along with the doom of confronting David, actually confronting him, walking in painful shoes, dinner, coming out, walking, his parents-- whatever, the point is:  _ it’s too much. _

He wanted numb Max back. 

_ What’s the point in feeling if it fucking sucks when I do? _

He wants vindictive Max back.

Max starts laughing. First, it’s a chuckle, just a little itch in his throat that he scratches, then it picks up pace until he’s full on hysterical. His face is warm and wet.

_ What the fuck is my life? _

Neil stays quiet, thankfully, just allowing Max to cry.

There’s holes in Max’s socks and pine needles stabbing his feet, his shirt is too tight his jeans are barely buttoned clothes and are cutting into his skin and  _ it hurts.  _ He wants to hit something or get drunk or… or…  _ He’s entirely too vulnerable right now. _

He thinks he made the right choice in calling Neil. He doesn’t want Nikki right now. He doesn’t want his fucking parents or Candy or anyone else who could be lurking (David.)

But he doesn’t want to be alone either.

Neil turns up the radio to give Max some privacy, driving slowly. Max tries to stop crying, he truly does, but it won’t stop, so he just stops fighting.

He doesn’t even know why he’s crying. 

Today was a good day, if you compare it to how it could’ve gone… 

He’s pretty sure David still likes him (for now, and the whole confrontation thing was entirely his choice) and Nikki’s out to her mom and so is Max and she  _ accepts  _ them. 

Max sighs and closes his eyes

It was a good day…

*

Neil never once asks Max why he was crying, but Max knew that Neil would listen if he decided to open his mouth. However, Max was mysteriously quiet the whole drive to Neil’s.

Max was more than a little sad to see that Neil no longer lived at the house he lived in for most of his childhood. This house was big, expensive, and in a gated community. Max hopped out of the car, shutting it gently. His backpack hangs off one shoulder and smells like cigarette smoke. Max is embarrassed to set it on Neil’s white bedsheets out of fear the smell will transfer, but Neil raises an eyebrow judgmentally when Max sits on the floor with his bag on his lap. 

Wooden floors can be mopped...

“You don’t have to sit on the floor,” Neil mutters, but Max feels small.

Max feels like a toddler, mimicking Neil as he grabs his homework from the bedside table.

_ He lied,  _ Max thinks,  _ he  _ **_was_ ** _ busy. _

Max splays the assortment of homework he collected during the 2 weeks he was absent with Nikki and had barely made a dent in. He has already finished his math sheets, since he’s always been good with numbers. French was easy with Google Translate. IPC was decently easy since most of the answers were online. History and English were entirely different.

Max didn’t have a way with words and US History was so, so boring. And his coach, the history teacher, always hit on the female students so it’s not like he was actually  _ learning  _ anything, but he was sure being quizzed on it.

Max sighs and digs into the pile anyway.

Hours later, Neil had finished his work and had shifted to quietly listening to YouTube videos. Max had gone through a hefty amount of work. At least he thought it was a good chunk until he saw there was an even bigger stack still left undone and laid down on the floor, done for the night. His wrist hurt, he had a headache, he was tired, his face felt sticky, his back hurt, his phone was dying.

His patience was wearing thin.

Neil had tried to get him on the bed a few times, but Max had declined repeatedly until Neil gave up and threw a pillow and a blanket on the floor for Max to use.

Neil seemed to notice Max was getting ready to sleep because he shut his computer and flicked the lamp off. They laid in silence, the only sound in the room the hum of the fan and soft breathing. 

“Thank you,” Max whispers.

“Any time.”

Max never tells Neil about it.

*

It takes a few weeks for people to notice that, while Max and Nikki are still always around each other, they are not _ together _ . They walk to class together still, sure, but no nicknames or long staring. No touching, no kissing, no desk scooting. Sometimes, he catches Nikki squeezing his hand in 1st or 5th period on tough days, but always in secret and never as a public display they put on for others. Those little comforts were his and his alone. 

Nikki notices Max’s gloomy mood, but Max always tells her not to worry.

He’s numb Max again.

And for now, he really  _ is  _ okay… He’s just  _ adjusting _ .

He’s sure when people stop asking why he and Nikki broke up and when David finally stops ignoring him, everything will sink in.

But until then, he smiles minutely and forces his mouth to greet people, even if it’s quiet.

Winter break rolls around and Max spends the first few days of it curled up in bed on his phone until he starts feeling sick from being in bed all day and decides to walk.

And he walks.

And then he jogs.

He never sees David anymore, but he sees his car sometimes. He wonders if David gave up. 

He wonders if he can give up himself.

Christmas brings an invite from Nikki that he takes up. She spends most of the time on the phone with Ered and Max tries to be happy for her, but he feels lonely. 

Nikki tells him he looks healthier.

Him and Neil exchange ‘Merry Christmas’ messages.

New Years brings him to a new decade. 2020 is the same as every year, though. He hopes he can change that.

When school starts back up again, Max has gained a little weight and he sees something when he flexes. He jogged his first mile straight, which was a vast improvement compared to a month ago when he couldn’t run 100 feet without needing a break.

He just can’t shake the numbness. 


	12. Chapter 12

Max drinks a lot of coffee, like _a lot_ of coffee.

He thought that running at night would help him fall asleep, but it became apparent that _that_ wasn’t the case. He’d be up for hours afterwards, adrenaline rushing. But, he didn’t want to run when the sun was still up out because it was too hot. So, he sacrificed his precious hours of sleep and drank coffee in exchange for that sacrifice.

Max is staring out the window in 2nd period geometry, staring out at the marching band practicing on the football field. He already turned in his test 15 minutes ago, so the sound of the drums be banged did very little to bother him, but his geometry teacher was annoyed, constantly glancing over at the window when the noise got a little louder than just a whisper.

Max had tried sleeping for the spare time, but the coffee was making him jittery. He wanted to leave. He wanted to get out. He wanted to run. He felt cramped, like he was going to explode with energy but couldn’t. It was a familiar itch, something that had him tapping his fingers on his desk as some kid to his right banged his pencil in beat to the song outside. The teacher kept shooting the two of them dirty looks but there was only one kid left testing, and they had been sitting still and in silence for almost an hour.

Max wanted to jump up and stretch.

_Fuck, when is this class ending?_

Through the luck of whatever holy being was above, the bell rang.

He hopped up immediately, banging his knee against the desk, but he recovered easily.

“Edwin, if you need to…” The teacher was whispering quietly to the kid who still hadn’t finished his test, but Max was already out the door before she finished her sentence.

He pulled his phone from his bag and popped his earbuds in, dodging the crowds of people who seemed a little bigger now that he walked the halls alone. He was growing, though. He had been a little later than most to hit puberty, which is why he was kind of relieved that he wouldn’t be stuck this height forever. He couldn’t button his favorite pants anymore.

He felt energy crackling throughout his body, but his mind was sluggish. It wouldn’t be intentional if he bumped someone, which is why Max was glad people parted and walked around him. 

Max didn’t have the energy most days to talk, he only hummed. 

He didn’t know when (or if) this slump would shake. 

He kind of scared himself.

He had been a little distant from Nikki too recently and he knew she noticed it too. She tried to be patient with him since everything was still a little new, but he could tell he was worrying her. He just had no motivation. He had no little push to get him out of his tiny pit he dug himself. Sometimes, the descent was so minute that you couldn’t recall how you even got there.

He slept through 3rd period, which was a ‘video day’ and they had been warned strictly against sleeping, but they weren’t so strict when it actually came to acting on the warning. 

4th period, he listened to the out-kid talking with the girl next to him about some TV show he was watching as she copied his answers. The kid was actually a decent student, despite the train wreck of a french teacher (the third this year. The last one has quit over winter break.)

The days were boring, they blended together. The hours moved like jelly, all clumped and slow slow _slow._

In 5th period, David walked around the room to make sure everyone was reading, but conveniently avoided the back corner where Max sat, staring straight at David. At this point, Max didn’t even care. Max would stare. Nikki nudged him sometimes when even she thought it was getting creepy, but he stared. If David wouldn’t look at him, then he would do the looking for both of them. 

Max’s knee was bouncing, fingers tapping. He was annoyingly anxious. The caffeine usually wore off around this time, but he was full fledged twitching like he was having a seizure. 

“Alright, everyone find a natural stopping point and put your books away. Make sure you mark where you stopped today in your notebook. Hopefully you’ve finished because your book talks are due this friday, but if you haven’t yet, there’s no shame. Just make sure you finish before the deadline because a zero would bring your grade to possibly failing,” he smiles at everyone, “If you are borrowing one of my books, make sure to return it out check it out. The check out list is on the side like always.”

Half of the class stands up and makes their way David’s book shelf. David was devoured by the crowd of people and Max blinked at the loss of sight of David. He sighed and stood up, making his way to the front of the classroom. He also borrowed a book. Once he’s closer, he sees David in the crowd, dragging a chair through the students. David wasn’t short, per se, but he was absorbed in every crowd. He was average height.

Max stared at David as he made his way over to the projector with the rolly chair. Max felt his fingers twitch as he joins the crowd of people and moves slowly towards David in curiosity. Someone (Nurf) had stolen the little book fair, finger pointer thingy he usually used to turn on the projector and he’d been using a chair the past week. 

David climbs onto the rolly chair and it moves under his weight. He grips the back of the chair to balance himself. Max hands his borrowed book to someone in the dwindling crowd and they put it back for him. David reaches up and pushes the power button and the chair shifts again. David grabs hold to the projector to balance himself. Max grabs one of the arms of the chair to steady it. He’s pretty sure David doesn’t even notice him there.

The image being projected on the board is a blue error sign. David fiddles with one of the cords he must’ve pulled loose ‘cause the laptop screen finally pulls up. David releases the projector and seems to notice Max for the first time as he looks down. He jerks away suddenly and the chair is pulled from Max’s grip as David comes tumbling down with pinwheel arms. Max manages to stop David from hitting the floor but he stumbles at the weight of the older man. Shocked gasps spread across the classroom from people who were watching, as David’s foot lands on Max’s foot and he hisses in pain as he stumbles. 

Max doesn’t releases his grip but falls flat on his ass. David falls flat on his ass too, bumping his head loud and hard enough to make the wall shake and rumble like thunder.

The rolly chair flies across the room and smacks a random desk. The occupant of the desk doesn’t seem to care much about that as she and a few others stand up to check on David. Max stands first, shoulder hurting from the force, and speaks lowly to David.

“You good?” It’s one of the first things he’s said to David in a month.

David nods, eyes shut.

Max can see his nose wrinkling though. They both know he twisted his ankle and is possibly concussed.

Nikki is the first to arrive, having probably been staring at the two of them long before the fall. 

Max feels less twitchy.

She and Max start to pull David up as more people grab random parts of his arm to help haul him up. Max positions himself in a way that, when David starts to fall again from trying to not put weight on his hurt foot, Max is there under his shoulder to hold him up. Someone wheels the rolly chair over and it takes a second for Max to get the hint to gently sit David down on it. David is gripping Max’s shoulder, Max is gripping David’s shirt. 

Max shakes away the familiar image.

“I’m gonna bring him to the nurse,” Max announces and people back up and give them a little space.

“You don’t-” David cuts himself off in pain and Max sees blood in his mouth. 

_Must’ve bit his tongue._

Max starts pushing the wheelie chair as the crowd erupts in “is he ok?” and “Is he hurt?”

Max decides he likes his classmates.

The teacher from next door peeks his head in, probably to see what the noise was.

After a few seconds of explaining, he sends Max to bring “Mr. Luna” down to the nurse as he settles the class down. David stays silent, and doesn’t protest, which is a surprise. But Max can tell he’s in pain as he wheels him out the door and towards the nearest elevator.

“You’re an idiot,” Max tells him.

David opens his eyes and looks at him… or tries. His eyes look a little distant. 

“I had a bad feeling, y’know?” He says to David, but they both know he only fell because Max was there.

It kind of hurts.

The throb in his shoulder picks up pace as they get on the elevator. Max uses his good arm to press the 1st floor button. Someone passing by gives them a weird look but continues on their merry way. The door shuts and the elevator rattles as it moves down.

“I’m sorry,” David whispers.

Max doesn’t respond.

*

Max just pulled a muscle.

David had a concussion and came back to school the 2 days later with a crutch and some sunglasses, which Max’s classmates laugh at David about. He knows they’re all relieved he’s ok. Harrison “takes it too far” when he asks if that means the book talk to postponed.

“If I’m ok enough to come to school and teach, you’re ok enough to finish your book and do the talk.”

Harrison whines at that, since the play rehearsals theater arts was putting on ran late last night or whatever and he was ‘exhausted.’ Max is glad he turned down the offer to try out because he didn’t think he could function with less sleep than he was already getting.

During class, David doesn’t really speak much, just electing that everyone takes the time to catch up on class work, read, or ask him for help with something if they need it. He looks at the class occasionally and Max wonders if he’s looking at him through the shades.

A few people in class give Max a pat on the back as they come to his side during the free time for helping David out. David’s a weirdo but people like him ‘cause he’s human. Because he _tries._ Max smiles at them because these little things boost his energy levels. He even joins in on the discussion that everyone seems to be having.

She ruffles his hair and scoots her chair a little closer to him.

“So, I was talking with Ered, since my birthday was coming up, right?”-- Max nods. --“And I was thinking about driving to her dad’s to go see her. Nothing is confirmed yet, but I wanted to let you know so you can find a ride to school for those days.”

“Hey, man, congrats. You’ll let her know I said hi, yeah?”

“Duh!”

Nikki shoves his shoulder and pulls out her phone, showing him google images of Ered’s house. The place is _huge._

_And I thought Neil had a big place._

The two of them speak quietly about the subject. Him and Nikki had been avoiding the subject of the two of them (or at least Nikki) coming out to the school. They had just barely shaken the married or pregnant rumors and were still in the middle of the ‘they broke up’ rumors and Nikki didn’t want anyone to think the two of them broke up because of Ered.

Max had suggested to her that she could expose the whole fake relationship thing on instagram and snapchat if she wanted as long as she left out the part where he was gay. He wasn’t ready for that yet, and it seemed neither was Nikki. They were still stuck in this weird phase of ‘breaking up.’ 

Still, the option was out there. Max just requested a heads up so he could prepare himself mentally for whatever would be coming his way.

When the bell rings, Max stays behind. David is sitting at his desk, sunglasses off, rubbing at his eyes. To make his presence known, Max fiddles with the blinds by his desk, dropping them and closing them. David looks up at the racket.

“Yes, Max?” David asks but he sounds tired; the complete opposite of what he sounded like in class.

Max doesn’t know if David’s tired of him or if he’s just more relaxed around Max.

Max stands up from his desk and walks over to another set of blinds. He drops and closes those too as as David stares at him. 

“In the afternoon, the sun sets this direction,” Max says, “No one would mind if you kept the classroom dark… you know, for your concussion.”

It sounds a little suggestive, but Max didn’t mean it to. He’s had a concussion before and he knows how much they suck.

“Are you well enough for me to do my book talk?” Max asks, taking out the book talk that’s folded in his pocket.

“Of course,” David says a little brighter.

He leaves the sunglasses off, the room much dimmer with the blinds closed. David usually kept the lights dimmed, so it was a nice ambience. Max pulls a seat over from the nearest desk and sits down quietly. He had the book he’d read last night when he couldn’t sleep in his hand. He hands it over to David.

He states his favorite quote, the title, the author’s name, and the theme. David skips through the pages of the book. Max watches silently, biting his lip. David lands on a page and asks a question based on a random paragraph. Max answers it. David nods along to Max’s words and hands the book back. 

“Thank you, Max.”

Max closes the book softly and hands David his written out book talk in exchange. Max watches as David skims it with a small smile. When he writes down Max’s grade, Max watches the little triangle freckles.

“Any time, David,” Max says. 

*

The next day, Max stays after once again, closing the blinds just like before. David spares him a glance but goes back to reading whatever was laid out of the desk before him. Once Max is done with the blinds, he pulls up a chair and drags it quietly over to David’s desk. Once again, he sits down without a sound and pulls out his phone. He opens Instagram. 

Max pulls up David’s Instagram account and likes a picture. Davi’d phone vibrates with the notification. David looks at it and Max sees his face turn a little red.

“What?” Max asks innocently when David clicks the phone off.

“Do you need anything?’”

Max can see through his eyelashes that David is looking at him. His red hair is drooping in his face, tickling one of the freckles by his eye. Max likes that freckle.

“Sure,” Max repliés nonchalantly, “What’s your favorite color?”

David’s eyes narrow but he answers anyway.

“Yellow.”

Max clicks off his phone screen and sets the phone face down on David’s desk. Max looks up and meets David’s eyes. They’re a nice shade of green.

“Mine’s blue.”

“I know.”

Max smiles at him and gently stands up, grabbing his phone. He leaves without another word.

*

When Max checks that night, David still hadn’t blocked him on Instagram.

*

Friday night around 8pm, Max saw David in the hallway. He had just returned from his run and was in shorts and a tank top and smelt like sweat. David was in the hall with Gwen and Gwen’s husband. They were all dressed up in regular clothes. Gwen was locking up and David was talking with Gwen’s husband, laughing. He was leaning against the wall with his crutch right beside him. His sunglasses were off, since the ceiling lights were shitty and dim, and it was dark enough outside to not worry about any weird side effects.

They hadn’t noticed him idling by the stairwell door yet. Max cringes but decides to continue down the hall as quiet as possible, pausing his music. They (David) can’t avoid each other forever. Anyway, it’s _his_ apartment building. It’s normal he’d run into them every once in awhile.

Mrs. Gwen notices him first. 

“Hi, Max,” she says, “Back from your run?”

Although David could easily avoid him since he didn’t live here, Mrs. Gwen had occasionally spotted him coming back from his nightly runs. Since his adrenaline ran higher, he was in more of a talking mood after a run. Max had spoken with her the first time a month ago out of curiosity of whether or not she _knew._ She didn’t. She stopped him to talk every time after that, mostly about grades and future plans, but sometimes about her life as well. She talked about her trashy TV shows and what the married life was like. Max was polite enough to listen. After all, he’d get to hear about David sometimes. 

Max enjoyed those conversations the most. A few weeks following the confrontation with David, Max had researched David. He had stalked his social media accounts and David’s friends’ accounts. He even hypothesised that the “friend of Gwen’s” David had dated was that Jasper guy. Not to speak ill of the dead, but it looked like the dude left David for a woman, who he married 2 years ago before he kicked the bucket in a rock climbing accident.

“Hi, Mrs. Gwen,” Max greets back, taking the opportunity to wipe his face with the bottom of his shirt to show some skin.

Max was all for teasing David, even though his intentions had changed since the last time he had done so.

“How far did you go today?” 

Max continues walking towards them, distance closing inch by inch.

“5 miles,” he says with some thought.

“Nice!” She says.

He slows before her. David is staring, silent. Mrs, Gwen’s husband has also fallen silent, but he is smiling kindly at Max.

“Yup, I’ve improved a lot. I didn’t run the whole way, but a few breaks don’t hurt my progress.”

Max pops his earbuds out and shoves the cord in his pocket. He reaches out and shakes Mrs. Gwen’s husband’s hand.

“What were you listening to today?” The husband, Derek, asks.

“OneRepublic throwbacks,” he grins.

“No way! David here listens to them a bit when he’s not listening to his weird talk show podcast thingy.”

“Farmers Almanac isn’t weird,” David quietly defends.

“You know David, right?” Derek says, ignoring David’s whined comment.

“Yes, sir. He’s my teacher this year.”

“Really?” Gwen asks, turning to David, “You never told me my bratty neighbor was your student.”

“I didn’t know he was your neighbor…”

_Liar._

“Huh. I thought y’all met before…”

Max remembers back to the first day he met David. After he ditched David in the stairwell, he had bumped into Gwen in the hall. She probably assumed they met (they did.)

“No,” Max agrees with David, “I didn’t know y’all knew each other.”

“He’s a good friend of mine. He was my little, nerdy assistant a few years ago. Must’ve had you as my student after he got his teaching certificate, then?”

“I guess so, I had you for my sophomore year 2 years ago.”

Gwen’s eyebrows raise.

“That’s crazy. You’re graduating this year, then?”

“Yup.”

“Wow, you students sure grow up fast.”

Max laughs politely and pretends to receive a text and pulls out his phone to check. Gwen notices.

“Alright,” she says, “It was nice talking to you, but if I don’t get a margarita in me in the next few minutes, I’m gonna be cranky.”

“Yup,” Max says and accepts her side hug she offers, “It was nice seeing you.”

Max shakes Derek’s hand.

“Nice talking to you,” Derek and Max say to each other.

He lingers a little while shaking David’s and smirks a little at the redhead.

“See you tomorrow, _Mr. Luna.”_

Gwen laughs a little, knowing herself that no one calls David that.

He steps between David and Derek and continues down the hall. As he unlocks the apartment door, he glances back at the group of adults and sees David is doing the same. Max smiles and raises a hand before David quickly turns his head back around and disappears into the stairwell.

Max leans against the front door for a second.

_Did I act weird? I hope not._

_*_

Monday, Max sees David outside of Gwen’s apartment. They fall into silent step with one another. They say nothing to each other but nod in greeting.

Max beams the whole way to school.

*

“So,” Nurf was saying, “I think we should all meet up on the football field Friday night at 8pm-ish after the game and play Ghost In The Graveyard.”

Everyone’s face lit up. They hadn’t played those types of games since recess in elementary school. Max nods along. He’d heard people talking about it all day. Nurf was lowkey popular, so when he threw a party or event, people would listen.

“So,” Nikki says, popping up a chair next to Max, “Are you going?”

Max nods.

“I miss playing stupid games like that.”

“Me too,” she says, “I’ll pick you up.”

“Alright, sounds like a plan.”

*

Nikki gives him a heads up that night.

*

Tuesday is silent. Max saw Nikki’s Instagram post that morning, with more than 200 likes and 30 comments. The school meme page even posted a video of someone crying “in response” to the announcement. 

People stare at Max and try to talk to Max, but he stays silent on the subject. He knows the first day the rumor gets out, no one wants the truth. The truth comes tomorrow.

The school even called Nikki and him down to the office to “discuss” the post. Candy defends her daughter and says the post had nothing to do with school so they had no right to make her take it down or punish her for it.

Max explicitly tells them he was not being _bullied,_ he was completely ok with her post.

Max stays in David’s classroom for lunch. Finally, his stupid sunglasses are off.

*

Wednesday, people ask. Max answers. Everyone had heard about it at that point.

Upon Nikki’s request, he posts a picture of her and Ered kissing. It was a picture taken last year before Ered’s mom and step dad caught on to their relationship. He captions it “my favorite power couple.”

In 5th period, Max pretends David doesn’t exist. David does the staring for the both of them.

Max wants to laugh. How is he supposed to expect David to “find him” but Max doesn’t even know who he, himself, is?


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops. Sorry for disappearing for a bit and for the short chapter. I’ve been planning some stuff out. Here’s (mostly) a filler.

Very late Thursday night (actually very early friday morning) finds Max hanging around the train tracks with a pocket full of pennies to smush.

He had gotten off from school, convinced himself into buying his second pair of shoes in the past 2 months, went home, went for a run, came home again… he was not tired, ran again, home… now he’s out again. 

He could hear the train horn in the distance as he crouched down by the track and lined the pennies up on one of the beams. It was getting colder out. Spring was more of a winter in Texas than winter was winter, so he was bundled up his hoodie, thick socks, and a new beanie. It was windy, but maybe it’s because he was by a major road and the passing cars drove past with such force, he was almost blown from his feet. 

Max backed away from the tracks as he saw the train’s lights in the distance. He crossed the ditch by the tracks, hopping over the rain water and getting his (luckily old) shoes muddy. He cursed but climbed up the other half of the ditch and approached the forest just as the train blew its horn again. The train crossing rods lowered and blocked traffic from crossing the railroad. Max ducked behind a tree just in case one of the pennies ricocheted and tried to take him out, but the train passed over the tracks slowly, tempting Max to try to train hop, but he liked having all his limbs. He tried to take pictures of the graffiti covering the sides of the train carts, but it was too dark and the train was moving too “fast” for his stupid phone to get a decent photo.

Once the train passed, he headed back towards the tracks. He studied the pennies without touching them in case they were still hot. A few had smeared together into one mess. He frowned at the blob but picked it up with a stick and threw it into a little metal can he brought with. He used the stick to shovel the rest of the pennies into the can and sighed.

It was funner when he was younger and had someone else to do it with. 

(Funner was totally a word, shush.)

He shook his haul around before sticking the can into his pocket. He headed to the 24 hour gas station nearby.

The clerk stared at him with dead eyes, as any sane person would at this hour, and didn’t even bat an eye as Max mashed the button of the nacho cheese machine aggressively. The damn thing was always out of cheese. He grabbed an Icee too while he was at it, since he just _wanted_ to struggle with machines. It took 6 years but the damn thing finally filled his cup. Max paid and left. 

Max ran, sure, but Max didn’t eat healthy. Healthy was _never_ Max’s thing. He tucked the Icee under one arm as he pulled out his earbuds and called Nikki. The two had started talking a little more this past week for obvious reasons, but Max was a little relieved she wasn’t mad at him for being so distant recently. 

“Hey, boo,” she says once she picks up.

“Hey, you’re still up?”

Not much of a surprise there, really. The two of them hadn’t slept much this week. For obvious reasons.

“Yup and it seems you’re also up at... four in the morning?! I swear it was just eleven… I’m screwed.”

Max laughed and munched loudly on a nacho as Nikki complained about the sound. 

“Don’t suppose we could skip?” Max offers.

“We can’t. At least, I can’t. I’m already missing my birthday week and I’m really not looking forward to having anymore makeup hours.”

“Oh? You confirmed that?”

“Confirmed wh- oh! Yeah, it’s official: I’m seeing Ered in February!”

“Hey, man, congrats!” Max says wholeheartedly.

“Thanks, dude, but Ered’s being Ered again. She fucked with her hair and now she won’t let me FaceTime her because she wants me to see it in person.” 

Max hums along as Nikki talks about hair colors and lengths she’s been thinking about and Max pretends to listen. He already knows she’ll dye it that minty green color again that she’s had for years. Max helped her dye it pink once and the next day, it was that same damn color. He has no idea how she managed to do it in only a day, but she was whining about hair damage for a month after that. (If really wasn’t that damaged, in Max’s opinion.) 

Nikki had mint green, curly hair that reached her belly button and poofed out like a dandelion when the humidity got bad. Nikki was anti-change.

“Listen to me, asshole,” she bitches, regaining Max’s attention, “I’m serious, I’m gonna cut it.”

“Sure.”

Max crosses the street, past that stupid flickering streetlight.

“No, for real.”

“Yup.”

He approaches the door and frees a hand to type in the code.

“Max, there’s hair _on my floor!”_

Max chokes on his food in surprise. Coughing, he hunches over in front of the door. He squats down and sets his drink down so he can pound at his chest in an attempt to dislodge the nacho.

“Ew, Max.”

“W-when,” Max takes a few seconds to catch his breath, “When did you cut it?”

“Before I called you.”

“Nikki!”

“Sorry! Ered wouldn’t let me see her’s, and it got me thinking…”

“Nikki…”

“It’s not _that_ bad.”

“FaceTime me,” Max demands and pulls his phone out, clicking the FaceTime button himself. 

She answers and he sees her standing in her bathroom. 

“Nikki,” Max starts laughing, “Please tell me you’re joking.”

“It’s not that bad,” she says quietly.

“Shoulder hair would be a look on you, alright? But, dude, I would be a shitty friend if I let you go to school with that tomorrow! You cut it _so_ unevenly.”

“What am I supposed to do?” She whines.

“Pick me up, I’ll fix it for you.”

*

Max fixes it. She looks stunning with shoulder length hair.

She’s taking a shower to wash out any stubborn clipped hair chunks while Max lays on her bed, staring at the ceiling fan. He stole a shirt from Nikki’s closet because her hair was stabbing him through his shirt. He’s pretty sure it was his shirt originally, anyway. 

As much as he wants to sleep, Max gets up and makes the two of them coffee. When he returns, she’s applying makeup in a towel with her sopping wet hair pushed back. Max has curly hair as well and he knows you don’t touch that shit with a towel while it’s wet or else you get a frizz pile when it dries. He looks awhile politely when she gets dressed and the two of them stare at one another for a moment once she’s out of the closet. 

“You sure you don’t want to cut your hair too?”

*

Max felt weird without all the hair. He had a huge mop of it on his head just two hours ago, but Nikki came at it with scissors. It was decently long on top and a little shorter on the sides. She had dragged her fingers through his hair on the sides and cut off whatever went past her fingers. He gave her some shit about it, but she promised that it was even and that her hair had only been uneven in the first place because it was hard to cut your own hair. 

Max knew that, it was just funny to tease her.

On top, she curled her hand into a fist and cut whatever went past that. Max judged her process greatly.

But the results were sick.

When the two of them entered the school together just in time for 1st period, they received a bunch of compliments from their friends. 

Nikki with her poofy bob and Max with his… whatever. Now you could see his ears and neck, which couldn’t be seen before. 

“You look less like a stoner now,” Nikki had told him. 

People complimented him all day, all _“Did you cut your hair?”_ No shit Sherlock “ _It looks good.”_

It didn’t really matter what it looked like to other people, but it seemed to work in attracting David’s attention. 

“It makes you look older,” David told him as the rest of the class filed into 5th.

Max liked his compliment the best.


	14. Chapter 14

Max blamed Nikki for this whole thing situation.

On Friday, after playing Ghost In the Graveyard with the 40 other people who decided to show up, (Max kicked _ass)_ everything seemed to calm down. On Monday, no one talked about Nikki and Ered anymore. All the rumors had settled down and three things were made clear: Max and Nikki never dated, Nikki and Ered we’re together and Max was supportive, and Max was single.

It was extremely weird that, in 4th period French, one of the girls Max had known since sophomore year but had never spoken to was suddenly all up in his personal space. Her name was Tabii or something. He ignored all of her small comments and advances for half the class until she got the hint and stopped trying to flirt with him.

Max understood he wasn’t the stereotypical gay guy that was portrayed in movies andbooks. He wasn’t tall but he wasn’t short. His voice wasn’t deep, but it wasn’t high. He didn’t hit on every guy he saw (he  _ hated _ that stereotype) or well, anyone, for that matter…  _ but _ David and that douche from his freshman year. And both of those have turned out badly so far. David was still keen on avoiding him but at least he didn’t outright kick Max out of the class when the bell rang.

And all of this-- all of the cliches he wasn’t -- didn’t make him  _ not  _ gay though. Because he was. 

But it wasn’t obvious, so when the flirting persisted from other girls he did or didn’t know, all of whom wanted a valentine before Valentine’s Day, Max did his best to ignore them. Nikki thought it was a little funny but wished him luck and told him it would get better once Valentine's Day passed. 

Tabii continued to sit next to him in class and even though the flirting had stopped, her presence dissuading anyone else who wanted to bother him. She was good company too, if not a little weird. Max even got to play matchmaker with her and Neil when she peeked over Max’s shoulder and saw Neil’s Snapchat story. He gave her his Snap and sent Neil a quick message letting him know where this random girl got his Snapchat from. 

And then it was February and the flirting was  _ worse.  _ Their school had a little fundraiser where you could pay a dollar and fill out a list to find your “perfect match” AND a carnations booth where you could buy someone a single flower for $1 or a bouquet for $5 that would be given out next Friday for Valentine’s Day. 

And Nikki, who saw that this whole thing was bugging him, invited him over for a sleepover. In 5th period, they had some spare time to plan it since Nikki said they  _ had  _ to plan it like middle schoolers. David was standing at the front of the class with an expo marker planning their Valentine’s Day class party since  _ most  _ people did their Book Talk. 

“I’ll bring chips,” Max offered and Nikki nudged him in annoyance of being ignored.

David smiled at him and wrote it down on the board in his messy yet neat writing. Max wasn’t sure how it could be both but it was

After class, Nikki dragged him to the Dollar Tree to buy face masks (“It’s important for what I have planned, don’t bitch,” Nikki has said.) and snacks and lotion and everything necessary for a “spa” day or whatever. Max rolled his eyes at her and paid for it as an “early birthday gift” so she would stop complaining about him spending money.

He was still gonna get her something for her birthday. That was just a show of appreciation.

They stopped and got food and coffee before heading back to her place. Her mom was still at school when they got back for tutorials, so Nikki shot her a text to let her know Max was over and that they already ate.

Max reluctantly took the face mask Nikki handed him and put it on while she put on her own. When they looked at each other, they burst out in laughter. 

“You know that spongebob episode where Squidward gets covered in concrete or something?”

“Smelly!”

“Yeah,” Max laughed, “You look just like him!”

Once they took off the masks, she made him apply lotion and sprayed him with this stinky lavender body mist. She even managed to convince him to let her paint his nails black (he pretended to not want to do it.)

Once it dried, she threw some of his spare clothes at him and had him pose around the room as she took pictures with an expensive camera she got for her 16th birthday.

And then Nikki went into a rant about how cute he was and how she hated to see him be single and practically  _ begged  _ him to download Tindr.

“Remember when I said I was worried about you?”

“Nikki,” Max sighed. “ _ No _ .”

“Come on! You’ve spent the last  _ 3 years _ being single and moping.”

“And I’m cool with that.”

“AND spent the last few months flirting with a  _ teacher _ and that has gone nowhere— no offense.”

“Nikki.”

“You obviously are  _ interested _ in dating.”

And she just kept pushing after that.

So he said yes.

And then, well, they ended up here. 

And it was  _ her  _ fucking fault because she made him download the app and even helped him set up his profile with those photos she took of him-- Max had promised her he’d try it out for  _ one day--  _ and David had left the class to print out copies of the handout, so Max had taken out his phone. And, out of curiosity, he had opened up the Tinder app and swiped through a bunch of random guys and got a few matches that he dared not to message.

Then, it happened.

Max’s eyebrows raised and he must’ve made a noise because Nikki turned to look at him and peeked at his phone.

_ “David?”  _ Nikki hissed quietly and scooted her chair closer so she wasn’t craning her neck.

He pulled his phone to his chest possessively, but Nikki was not dissuaded and gave him puppy dog eyes until he finally sighed and showed her the screen.

**David, 24.**

**Occupation: teacher**

**Graduated: UT**

**Distance: 1 mile**

_ Hi, I like-- _

Nikki grabbed his phone before Max could even react. Max grabbed his phone and tried to pull it out of her hand, leading to an awkward tug-a-war that ended with both of them holding the phone between them. 

David was no longer on the screen, but some random guy named Jerard. 

Nikki accidentally swiped.

And Max has no idea which way.

“Nikki!” He said in a loud whisper.

Nikki looked between the phone and him in confusion, having not seen David when she snatched the phone. She awkwardly throws her hands up in surrender and scooted away. 

_ Probably texting Ered. _

Max sighed through his nose and tucked the phone back in his pocket. He looked over at Neil, who was on his phone as well.

_ Probably texting Tabii. _

Max had received the good news from Tabbi in French earlier that day.

Max thought back to what Nikki said the night before. 

She had a point.


	15. Chapter 15

Friday afternoon, Nikki leaves. 

After school, the two drove to her house, where she double-checked her suitcase to make sure she had everything. But like 7 different times. Max hauled her suitcase out to her car while she stressed over her appearance in the bathroom. It would be a long, 7 hour drive. More than likely, she’d be a tired wreck by the time she arrived, but Max said nothing. If fluffing up her hair and doing her makeup made her feel better, then whatever.

When Max got back inside, he saw Nikki sitting on the couch, staring at the front door, zoned out. Max clears his throat to catch her attention.

“You’ll be fine.”

“I know,” she admits, “I’m just… I don’t know.”

Max knew how stressed Nikki was over this. Ered and Nikki hadn’t seen each other in person in months. And, Ered still hadn’t seen Nikki’s haircut. 

But that’s not what this was about. Ered loved Nikki. Nikki wasn’t trying to impress her (ok she was, but not  _ this  _ much.)

“Are her dad’s really  _ that _ terrifying?” 

“I’m pretty sure they work in law enforcement.”

“So no more tax fraud?”

Nikki’s gave him a goofy smile, which Max returned. He sat down on the couch beside her.

“I get it,” Max says.

“Do you really though?”

“Of course. You already know her mom hates you. Nothing you can do there. She’s just a bigot like that. But her dad? Gay. And if they don’t like you, then they don’t like  _ you,  _ not what you are.”

“Wow, thanks, Max. Very uplifting.”

“ _ But  _ I  _ know _ they will love you. Firstly, you make their daughter happy and are there for her when she needs you. They obviously love her to death from what you’ve told me. Both of y’all have been sickeningly in love and happy and it almost makes me gag.”

Max dramatically sets his hands on her shoulders.

“Secondly, you’re amazing. You have such a positive outlook on everything. You have the best kind of humor and could easily win anyone over with that. You’re  _ always  _ there when someone needs you. You’re kind. Ridiculously kind. You’ve helped me through difficult times, even when we barely knew each other. You’re supportive. You’re beautiful. If they don’t love you, that's their loss.”

“Is this the part where you tell me you’re secretly in love with me.”

“Oh of course, there’s that too. I’m totally straight for you.”

Nikki laughs. Max grand her arm and helps pull her up off the couch. He turns her around and grabs both of her shoulders, leading her towards the front now.

“Now,” he says, opening the door. “Go get the girl!”

He gives her a gentle push and follows her out, locking up behind him with a spare key. He hears Nikki start her car. If she wanted to make it with daylight to spare, she’s have to leave now. Her mom had already said goodbye to her during their lunch period. Max knew Candy didn’t want her baby to leave and didn’t want to miss her birthday, but she knew it was what Nikki wanted to do. 

“It’s practice for when college starts,” she joked.

Max walked over to her car, and she rolled down the window. He sticks his head in.

“I’m serious, Max. As dramatic as this sounds, I truly wish you’d take it seriously: Give love a try… don’t decide for it what you’re worth. I know there’s a lucky guy out there who’s waiting for someone just like you to show up and become part of their life. I know you’re a pessimist, but I know you believe in soulmates too— You totally cried to that one romcom I showed you, so don’t even start with me.”

She reaches across the console and fluffs up his hair.

“I’ll be back in a week, I expect some good news.”

Max sticks his tongue out and her and backs away from the car.

“Fine, I’ll use your stupid app,” he says after a tense silence.

“Really?”

“Yes, now  _ go _ . I’m tryna go home, it’s cold.”

(If they spend another 5 minutes talking after that, then who knows. ((They totally did.)))

Once Nikki was gone, he headed back home.

*

True to his word, once he got back from his run, Max spent a few hours on Tinder swiping and trying to start decent conversations. Some of the guys are plain creepy or desperate, some are cool but not Max’s type, and some, Max isn’t  _ their _ type. The flirting falls flat, the conversation gets stunted, and Max spends lots of time curled up in his bed feeling embarrassed as he sends bad pick up lines. 

_ I tried,  _ he thinks, _ there you go, Nikki. _

*

On Saturday night as he’s returning back from his run, he receives the notification. 

**_You matched with David._ **

_ Don’t overthink it. _

Max stares at notification, wondering if it’s another David or if he’s just that damn lucky that Nikki accidentally swiped right.

**Max: Crazy seeing you here! (:**

_ Was that too friendly? Too eager? _

Max locks his screen out of embarrassment.

**_You received a message from David._ **

_ Ok, a response. That’s good. _

Max opens up the notification.

**David: whatre yo u dojng on tinder**

Max blinks at the message and snorts at the spelling.

_ Right. Totally normal to swipe right on someone you know. Happens all the time to people. _

**Max: hard to believe you had a degree in English**

**Max: I’m doing the same thing you’re doing on here**

Silence.

_ Ouch. _

Max walks past Gwen’s apartment and pauses at the music he hears bumping through the door. 

_ Drunk,  _ he notes.

He shakes his head and keeps walking, entering his apartment. His parents are home. He slips past them and heads to his room as quietly as he can.

A few troubling minutes later, he receives a message. A series of messages, actually.

**David: srry**

**David: it’s Gw**

**David: it’s Gwen’s birthday**

**David: stupid thumb**

**David: probably shouldnt texting roght now**

**David: did you do tge notes**

_ Yeah. _

**Max: no**

**Max: notes?**

_ Might as well keep him talking. _

**David: maxxx**

**David: it’s due monday**

Max curls up on his side, clutching the phone with both hands.

**Max: what’s it over again?**

**David: the socratic seminar**

**Max: oh yeahhh**

**Max: over what chapters?**

**David: …**

**David: the whole book**

**David: both the b ooks and thw play we read**

**David: both whole books**

Max snorts and rolls over.

_ He’s so annoyed with me. _

Max smirks.

**Max: the one about the elevator too?**

The music coming from Gwen’s apartment, which Max can even hear from his room, seemingly gets louder. Their building kind of sucks, so people frequently throw parties. Max is surprised someone hasn’t complained about the noise yet.

The reply comes 20 minutes later.

**David: thats thw only o ther book we raed be sides Of Mice and Men**

**David: so yes**

**David: do you like**

**David: just no t pay attettenrion inclass?**

_ Oh man he’s really drunk. _

**Max: I do**

**Max: just want to make sure I’m prepared**

**Max: it’s big brain time**

Max sends a meme.

**Max: gotta graduate with the 4.0 you know**

**David: you hav a 4.0??**

**Max: no**

**David: lol**

**Max: so what specific details should I look out for?**

David doesn’t reply for the rest of the night.

*

Sunday afternoon, Max opens Tinder.

**Max: You good?**

It takes a long time for David to respond, and Max is pretty sure it’s not because he was sleeping.

_ Probably didn’t expect me to message him ever again. _

**David: I’m feeling as good as a I can with a hangover**

Max stares at the keyboard, fingers hovering over as he contemplates how he should reply. He sighs and sends a stupid thumbs up gif (which is NOT pronounced like jif.)

**Max: Hope you like puking**

**Max: And water**

**Max: Can’t believe some people don’t like water**

**David: I love water**

**David: and ice**

**David: which I guess is the same thing**

**Max: WOW**

**Max: should’ve taught chemistry with knowledge like that.**

Max cringes and throws his phone onto his bed.

_ Stupid. Stupid. Stop reminding him. _

Max waits for David to send that “ _ oh yeah, I’m your teacher. I shouldn't be messaging you on a  _ **_dating_ ** _ app!”  _ text.

It doesn’t come.

No text does.

*

Monday morning, Max facetimes Nikki.

“Oh, hey Ered,” Max says he sees her face and  _ very pink hair. _

“Hi, Max!” She replies excitedly in that low, slow drawl of her’s. “She’s in the shower.”

Max suddenly feels bad, but he hides it with a friendly smile. He hadn’t heard Ered’s voice in over a year. He was friendly acquaintances with her, sure, maybe even friends, but he was Nikki’s friend through and through. When the two of them broke each other’s hearts, Max sided with Nikki and shut out Ered, who had basically no one to support her. Ered was friendly with a few girls, so it wasn’t like she was totally alone during the breakup, but they didn’t  _ know _ . Max wishes he had reached out. 

“I’m surprised you’re awake. I remember you were never a morning person.”

“Nikki brings out the worst in me,” Ered jokes.

Max laughs and bullshits his way through a polite conversation with Ered as he throws his clothes into the wash. Ered cooks breakfast. By the time Niki gets out of the bathroom and by the time Max is throwing his clothes in the dryer, Ered has sent him a text with her new number and an offer to listen if he ever needs to talk. Max wonders if Nikki told her anything. 

“How’s Mississippi?” 

“Gulfport is  _ so _ beautiful,” Nikki gushes. “The beach is so beautiful. We get to smoke and watch the sunset and walk around. Max, it’s  _ amazing  _ here and it’s only been a day!”

“That sounds amazing,” Max smiles, “But that’s not why I called. Happy birthday!”

“I’m a legal adult!” Nikki cheers, “Now I can get a tattoo and…”

“Yeah that’s about it.”

“Well, we should go together when I get back!”

“I’m holding you up to that offer. I’ve had an idea for some time now…”

“Ooh, mysterious.”

They end the call shortly after so Nikki and Ered can eat Nikki’s birthday breakfast.

*

Max has to leave earlier for school than usual since Nikki isn’t here to drive him. It’s only a  _ little  _ earlier since they usually wasted a half hour buying and consuming copious amounts of coffee and food each morning.

So Max leaves 10 minutes early.

He’s got both earbuds in and is dressed for the chilly weather but also the walk. No jeans today.

_ It’s sweatpants time, baby! _

So, imagine Max’s surprise when, as he’s passing Gwen’s door, the door opens. David looks just as surprised as Max when they make awkward eye contact. 

_ He’s not been coming over less, he’s just been avoiding me more. _

Max offers a polite smile as David joins him. They walk in silence down the stairwell.

“...You’re early,” David offers to ease the tension.

“Yup, I’m walking today.”

“Oh,” David mumbles, “In this weather?”

Max feels the nice breeze on his skin. 

_ The weather is nice. _

“Nikki’s out of town, so there’s nothing I can do about that.”

The two of them pause on the sidewalk where Nikki usually pulls up. The spot is (as expected) empty. David looks ready to bolt across the street, but he continues to hover. Max bites his lip, realizing the possibilities of where this conversation could lead if he plays it right. What David is trying to offer.

“I’ll have fun freezing my butt off?” Max says but it sounds more like a question.

Max slowly steps backwards like he’s about to leave.

_ Call me back. Stop me. _

“I have seat warmers…”

_ Score! _


End file.
